Creating a New World

Going to Ground

/ Lauri Ann Lumby / Leave a comment

Monday morning, I posted my ballot for the United States’ 2024 presidential election. As I handed my ballot to the postal worker, I heard, as a distinct command:

“Your work is done here.”

Indeed. It feels as such. I have spent the past almost sixty years sowing seeds of love, speaking truth to power, and shining a light on all that is not of love in our world. Whether I wanted to or not, I have been a beacon of light – revealing truth and unveiling falsehood. Whether by my words, my actions, or simply my presence, I have been like an acupuncture needle, inserting love so that what is not of love might be released from our world. My presence has been welcome by many and a bane to some – especially to those who are either living a lie, or who benefit from a system rooted in fear, power, and control.

I say none of this from a place of vanity or pride. Being love in a world that wants to hate is a thankless and difficult job. Rejection comes aplenty and in a capitalistic world – certain financial struggle. When part of your mission (I didn’t ask for this!) is to be a catalyst for the collapse of systems sustained by greed, hatred, division, power, etc., you are woefully unable to live in or by the rule of said-systems. The vehicles of deception and manipulation through which wealth is amassed are not available to me – I couldn’t deceive or manipulate if I tried – and I wouldn’t want to.

But here I’ve been dutifully showing up day after day after day for ALL OF IT – casting seeds of love – all while watching humanity not learn a single thing. If anything, the divide has become greater and the violence, greed, and hatred more acute. Humanity has lost its compassion (if it ever had any).  Rather, those lacking in compassion have grown louder and more apparent while those of us who have been trying to sow compassion have grown weary.

We’ve done all we can. Now, humanity has to decide – will it choose compassion and love or will it continue to choose division and fear?

As of today, humanity has not made its choice. But I have. I choose love and will continue to choose love. I’ve done all I can to plant those seeds and to be a presence through which love is made real in our world. Especially as it relates to the current decisions upon which rests humanity’s fate – I’ve done all I can do.

I have no more words to offer that might encourage one to make the choice for love instead of fear. As such, I’m going to ground. As the world works out its fate, I will be safely tucked away in a sanctuary of my own making. One of three-foot thick earthen walls invisible and impenetrable to those who have not been invited. To those who have, the coffee is always on, I have snuggle blankets aplenty, and a comfortable place for you to rest your weary soul. Perhaps after humanity has decided its fate, the world will welcome our presence and yearn to hear our wisdom and we will rise again like the seventeen-year cicada ready to share our songs of love with the world. In the meantime, we tuck ourselves safely away as we wait and watch.

What Privilege Taught Me to Believe

/ Lauri Ann Lumby / 1 Comment

and how those beliefs were undone

I didn’t grow up wealthy, but I did grow up privileged. I was born white to middle class parents, raised in a predominantly white third-generation neighborhood of white-collar professionals and tradesmen. In most of the homes around us, the men worked, and the mothers stayed home. The children were feral and unsupervised, only because everyone believed we were safe. We had a roof over our head, three square homecooked meals a day, new clothing (unless you were a younger sibling), and a basement full of toys. We enjoyed piano and dance lessons. Our parents sent us to private school.

Life was good and in that state of perceived safety and abundance, we believed in the promise of “The American Dream” – a good education and hard work was the path to success and the harder you worked, the more successful you would become. We were also taught that welfare was for lazy people and we should judge them and treat them accordingly. There was a clear dividing line between us (hard workers) and them.  And a not-so-subtle dividing line between us (white people) and them (people of color).

All of this happened along side a devout Catholic upbringing. God was the old man in the sky. We were undeserving of God’s love. God’s love had to be earned and could be taken away. And abortion was a mortal sin. We were even invited to join the school’s “Pro-Life” club from whom we would get a bright shiny silver bracelet marking us as “soldiers of Christ” in the war against abortion (this was all on the heels of Roe vs. Wade). As a young adult, I volunteered at a pro-life “clinic” for women facing unexpected pregnancies.

In addition to all of this: we were raised Republican. We were told Republicans were good and were looking out for the good of the people and that Democrats were communists – and that was bad! I remember knock down drag ‘em out fights between certain family members who (gasp) belonged on different ends of the political spectrum. The Democrats were good people, but clearly delusional – at least that’s what we were led to believe.

In college (YES!  I attended university, which was mostly paid for by my parents – another privilege), I joined a sorority (more privilege), continued attending mass and attended adult faith formation classes. I voted for Ronald Reagan, and later, for George H. W. Bush.

Other than being a brunette, I was the stereotypical white girl of privilege.

But then, life happened.

My previous stance on abortion was the first thing to go. In the volunteer position, I witnessed first-hand the violent tactics often used by the Pro-life movement in dissuading women from seeking an abortion. There was no compassion shown, only judgment, accompanied by violent and graphic images of late-term abortions. There was a reason I wasn’t allowed into the “counseling” room at the clinic. Additionally, with over 40% of pregnancies being unplanned, I was bound to eventually meet a young woman, likely a friend, who would have to face a sometimes-difficult choice. As statistics would have it – I did – come to know of several friends who at one time had to face an unplanned pregnancy. Further, I knew of several who had no choice but to seek the termination of the pregnancy for medical issues related to either the baby, or their own survival. Abortion, it turned out, wasn’t so black and white.  How could I judge a woman (or a couple) who was having to face the most difficult decision of their life – one that would stay with them their whole life. The decision to terminate a pregnancy (no matter what the circumstances) is a wound that does not heal.  It changes, but the pain will always be there on some level. Compassion told me to put myself in the others’ shoes and support them through a very difficult decision. And to understand that at any point, I could find myself in a similar position forced to make a similar difficult choice.

The second thing that went was my belief in the American Dream. The first of this leaving happened in my own professional journey. Sheepskin in hand, I went out looking for work. And this is a FACT – not once in my 40 years of being in the post-college workforce have I made more than $26,000 per year.  NEVER.  Not once.  This was not for lack of effort, work, skills, or abilities. Now at a ripe almost 60, it is not for lack of education, experience, or expertise. The universe has imposed some sort of invisible ceiling between myself and money – never even surpassing (which was also the big privileged promise) the salary of my father.

Hard work and a college education, as it turns out, is NOT a guaranteed path to wealth.

No matter how much someone else wants to tell you otherwise.

Then I experienced poverty. Thankfully not poverty of the sort that far too many suffer, but I have faced an enduring period of financial struggle – the likes of which has had me utilizing some of those so-called “communist” programs. I have received rental assistance and energy assistance. I qualified for Food Stamps and could have been using the Food Pantry (I chose to use neither, but at a grave consequence to me financially – eventually leading to bankruptcy). I have enjoyed the profound benefits of the Affordable Healthcare Act – in fact, my life depends on it. Finally, I am on an income-based repayment plan for my graduate school student loans (if anyone wants to argue with me about student loan forgiveness, DON’T!!!!!  I will direct you straight to Matt Taibbi and his expose’ on the criminal nature of the student loan industry!!!!!) 

Beyond my own personal experience, I have witnessed hundreds, if not thousands struggling with similar or much worse circumstances. I have seen, through clear eyes, that the so-called “American Dream” is a lie and that there are, indeed, systemic obstacles to Americans realizing that dream. This fact of reality breaks my heart and inspires me to share my own journey beyond the lies that come with privilege.

As it relates to Catholicism.  This may be the biggest irony of them all. I have always been a woman of faith (whatever that means). I was a devout Catholic until the local Church made it clear I was no longer welcome. Jesus is my teacher and Mary Magdalene has become a guide. I sometimes pray the rosary and turn to Michael the Archangel in times of anxiety. I cherish my Catholic upbringing – for good and bad – but mostly, for what I learned about social justice:

Jesus calls us to love.  Period. And he was quite clear about what love looked like:

  • Judge not lest ye be judged.
  • Love your neighbor as yourself.
  • Everyone is your neighbor.
  • Welcome immigrants and foreigners.
  • Feed the hungry.
  • Set prisoners and captives free.
  • Clothe the naked.
  • Heal the sick.
  • Give sight to the blind.
  • Welcome “the other” to your table.
  • If someone asks for your cloak, give them your shirt as well.
  • Love one another.  Period.

As it turns out, it is my faith that has called me to depart from the politics in which I was once immersed and toward a political stance that supports the needs of the all. As my own life has shown me, even privilege does not guarantee that life will provide us with what we need. It has also shown me that by our own efforts, our own needs may not necessarily be met. There’s a little story in scripture that seems to provide a solution to this quandary:

All who believed were together and had all things in common; they would sell their possessions and goods and distribute the proceeds to all, as any had need. (Acts 2: 44-45)

If a sharing among the common good was good enough for Jesus and his earliest disciples, then it’s good enough for me. This is what love has taught me.

Peace is an Act of Rebellion

/ Lauri Ann Lumby / Leave a comment

We live in a world that is driven by fear and thrives on chaos. Conflict and violence have become so much a part of life that entire economies are based on the lucrative business of war. Entire family systems have been defined by the abuse they inflict and then inhabit. The relationship paradigms we have been sold are rooted in codependency and hierarchical control. Our educational systems have lost their focus on learning and are now directed toward a definition of success that is rooted in a competition to acquire the most wealth, power, and fame. Careers are no longer centered in the search for meaningful and fulfilling work which helps to provide what a society needs to survive and thrive, but are instead geared toward making billionaires richer.

Fear, chaos, conflict, competition, violence, and abuse have become so much a part of our lives that we have come to believe that all of this is not only normal, but healthy. We shrug our shoulders and walk away when anyone dare question this status quo. “It is what it is,” we hear people say. Or things like: “it’s just how things are done, it’s what we’ve always known, I have to make a living…” And if anyone dare to offer another possibility – a life, for example, that might be peaceful, gentle, and full of ease, that person becomes a pariah – accused of being a “commie” or just plain insane.

Chaos, conflict, competition, and violence are a choice. It is one the vast majority of humanity has been making for five thousand years or more. But in the same way that conflict is a choice, so too is peace. Contrary to popular belief based on centuries of conditioning, we have the power to choose peace over conflict, collaboration over competition, ease over chaos, and gentleness over violence. But more often we don’t.  And we have to ask ourselves why.

The answer is simple. Choosing peace is an act of rebellion. When we choose peace, we are putting every single system based on fear, power, and control in question. When we choose ease, we are disturbing the status quo. When we disturb the status quo, we become a threat to those who benefit from a system based in fear, power, and control. And when we choose to be gentle, we are challenging all those who have come to belief conflict and competition are not only normal, but necessary.

Choosing peace strikes terror in the hearts of those who either benefit from fear, power, and control, or who believe that nothing else could possibly be true.

As a culture/species, we are addicted to conflict and chaos. For many, the idea of peace threatens this addiction. Because of their addiction, they seek more and more of what gives them a charge. Perhaps they know nothing other than trauma, so to them this feels normal. Maybe they are fueled by anger and resentment. Giving someone permission to choose peace threatens the drug to which they have become accustomed.

Choosing peace is an act of rebellion because of all that is threatened by this choice. AND, there is a way for humanity to choose peace, but it first has to recognize its addiction to violence (physical, mental, emotional, psychological, and spiritual violence), and take the critical steps in healing that violence. As that violence becomes healed, and the charge of addiction overcome, it is there that humanity will find its peace. In finding that peace, humanity will wonder, “What the heck was wrong with me that I would choose violence over this?” Choosing peace then becomes the thing that is most valued and what humanity would choose again and again over the violence it has previously come to know.

Choosing peace is an act of rebellion, and it begins with a dream. Dream with me!

Calling All Warriors

/ Lauri Ann Lumby / Leave a comment

As the RNC pulls out of Milwaukee, and the DNC moves toward penetrating Chicago, (puns intended), we find ourselves at a dangerous crossroads – all roads leading toward disaster.  At this crossroads we have an opportunity to make a deal with the devil, or find ourselves another way through this mess.

Indeed, we are staring the death of the republic in the face. Horrible to look at and yet we cannot look away!  This is an ending we have sadly brought upon ourselves.

As with the fall of Rome, we are facing an inevitable death – and die it will.  But unlike the Romans, we are being given a choice in the empire’s end.  We can allow ourselves to be destroyed by it – or rise above (or as I prefer – to burrow beneath).

Whether you are a “rise above” or a “burrow beneath” person, the formula is the same:

Be witness.

Hold center.

Be a tower/beacon of light (or darkness whatever the case may be).

Anchor love.

As a shadow worker, my job is to go to ground – to enter fully into the darkness that it may be transformed – darkness made of humanity’s fears and unhealed wounds.  Like a cicada, I dive deep into the detritus of humanity’s pain, wriggling and writhing until the pain has been released.  This I do safely in the shelter of my sanctuary that I call home.

Equally called to be a light bringer, I go about my day to day endeavors simply being me.  I have experienced that in my presence, either shadows are revealed, or others become more aware of their light.  Whatever the effects – the recoiling rejection brought forth by shadow’s emergence, or the welcome of light’s/love’s reflection – I’ve learned to hold it all.

Nothing is personal.

If any of this rambling speaks to you – you are one of the warriors to whom I’ve addressed this message. We’ve been given a difficult call – to witness to the end of the world (as we’ve known it), BUT we’ve also been given the wisdom, knowledge, and tools to endure.  Our task is this:

Endure and Survive.

Love-speed sisters and brothers, we are in this together.  Even if solitary – we are never alone!

Be witness.

Hold center.

Be a tower/beacon of light.

Anchor love.

It is all we came here to do.

With deep gratitude and love,

Lauri

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Witness

/ Lauri Ann Lumby / 1 Comment

I have no task now

but to bear witness.

To bear witness

to humanity’s destruction.

The warnings have been given.

The prophecies shared.

Yet they continue to turn a deaf ear

to the obvious.

The end is nigh.

What more to do

but wait

and watch,

thinking…

“I told you so.”

“I told you so.”

copyright Lauri Ann Lumby

Spiritual Warfare

/ Lauri Ann Lumby / 2 Comments

Yesterday started like any other day. I woke up at the end of deep, multi-dimensional dreaming. I was tired and a little worn, but I got about my day. Did my morning practice. Had breakfast. Answered a few emails. Went to yoga class. Picked up a prescription at Walgreens. Had a ZOOM meeting with a potential collaborator. Had lunch…

THEN…IT…HIT…ME

A steel wall of SOMETHING. The something felt like exhaustion and anxiety, pressure, weight and dread. I felt like I could pass right out standing. I tried to take a nap and found I could not. I took my afternoon coffee and read for a little then my soul screamed “Dairy Queen.” I grabbed my purse and head outside and again got hit by a steel wall of SOMETHING. I could barely see. The sun was too bright and too strong. I felt sick, nauseous, anxious, and afraid. I muscled a drive to Dairy Queen to get an Oreo Cookie Blizzard (why….by the way are medium Blizzards almost $6.00 when just a couple years ago they were $3.00?????). I came home and enjoyed my Blizzard (chocolate IS a remedy against dementors) while my body was quaking with SOMETHING. The anxiety was palpable and overwhelming and IT WASN’T MINE!  My whole body felt ill and like it was under attack.

Then came the call, “You doing ok?  I’m struggling. Ears ringing non stop. Disoriented and feeling like I’m under water. Literally gasping for air. Trying not to die. Holding space for you (protection from the evil eye symbol).”

OMG!  It’s not just me! Another spiritual warrior reached out to say, “Some major shit is going down and we’re being called to the front. Going into prayer.”

I thanked my friend.  Said “ditto.” Then I did the same. I went deep into prayer, sending healing and peace to whatever that SOMETHING is/was.

This is what it looks like to be called to spiritual warfare (for lack of a better word). Any day at any time something visible or invisible is happening in the world that calls us “to arms.” Our arms are not guns or bombs.  Instead, our arms are prayer and the healing balm of Love that resides within each of us that is called forth whenever collective healing is needed in our world. It’s intense work and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone, but I’m glad to do it – as if I ever had a choice!  God is funny that way.

Living in Dark Times

/ Lauri Ann Lumby / Leave a comment

We are living in dark times. In the United States where I live, we are facing very real threats to our liberties and our freedoms. In the past I have hesitated to call these actions “evil” because I do not believe in an external force of evil that is set out to harm us. As I no longer believe in an anthropomorphic “devil,” I cannot believe in evil as a malevolent force outside of us.

I still don’t believe in evil as an external god-like force, but after a week of deep prayer and meditation, especially around the evils I have experienced in my own life, I arrived upon an understanding of evil that I can agree to:

Evil is the physical manifestation of humanity’s fears.

When put into the context of what I believe about our human journey – its purpose and goal – which is to remember our original nature as Love/One by healing and transforming our unhealed fears, non-loving conditioning, trauma, woundedness, etc. I can believe in evil in this way.

Evil arises out of our collective fears and unhealed wounds.

History has shown this to be true. Nazi Germany – the Jewish Holocaust – and now the ongoing genocide in Palestine.  Naziism arose out of the unhealed fears/wounds of WW1, which led to the Holocaust.  Unhealed wounds over the Holocaust could be argued as the root of anti-Palestinian sentiments, oppression, and now genocide which has become the hallmark of Netanyahu’s hard-right Zionist movement. (to be clear…..I am not antisemitic. I am anti-genocide).

Caste

Something similar could be said of the United States – the core of our current (ongoing) troubles can be summed up in Isabel Wilkerson’s exploration of caste – a system based in the belief that “one kind of person is more deserving of freedom than another kind.” When western Europeans first settled in what later became “America,” they brought with them the wounds of the caste systems in which they were imprisoned. Never healing these wounds, they ended up inflicting the same kind of system on the indigenous who were already here, and later on every single group that was deemed “less than.” Caste, as Wilkerson argues, transcends racism. As such, Caucasians also suffer the effects of caste.

This unacknowledged caste system is at the root of our troubles and at the heart of it resides the unhealed wounds and fears of our collective past resulting in a lot of angry people who for generations have been ignored, oppressed, trod upon, denied dignity, honor and respect. When we examine this description, we see that nearly all of us qualify as suffering from caste in one way or another. The only ones who don’t suffer are those who have positioned themselves as “the ruling caste.” In the United States, these are extremely wealthy white men (and their complicit women) who have both stolen and been voluntarily given too much power.

Stolen power is easy to identify. Voluntarily given power is more difficult to comprehend. Who, in their right mind, would give an already powerful human more power? In short – those who feel most victimized by caste and who are desperately looking for someone to save them – specifically, those of the higher caste who promise to elevate another’s caste once put into power.

This is the work of evil – capitalizing on another’s unhealed wounds, vulnerability, and sense of powerlessness so that they might gain more power. The goal of evil is never to help or assist the “lesser-thans,” it is only to wrest more power from them.

Spiritual Warfare?

But what can we do in the face of such evil? Are we indeed powerless as the powerful and victimized would have us believe? The short answer is NO!  We are not powerless and we do have tools and resources to help us combat this evil.

Yes, I said combat. I’ve never been one to jump on the “spiritual warfare” bandwagon, because that platform is rooted in the idea of a malevolent external source over which we have no power, and equally benevolent forces who we must call to our aid – again because we ourselves are powerless.

I do not believe in our powerlessness. Instead, I believe that when we understand the root cause of evil in our world, then we have an entire arsenal of weapons at our disposal – ones we can engage in and call on anytime and which are in our own power to use and through their use effect change.

To effect this change, we must first understand that the root of evil is unhealed wounds and unacknowledged fear. We must then understand that the transformation of evil occurs when we individually and collectively work to heal those fears. Finally, as  Ulrich E. Duprée reminds in his book Ho’oponopono – the Hawaiian Ritual of Forgiveness, the fears and unhealed wounds we see in others are merely a reflection of the same fears in ourselves. When we engage in practices which support our own healing, there is a ripple effect that helps to bring healing to others.

With this, I offer two solid and effective practices for healing the unhealed fears and wounds in ourselves which can then help to support healing in others:

Ho’oponopono:

Recite the following mantra, directing the words toward yourself and to any feelings of fear or woundedness you might feel within yourself:

I’m sorry.

Please forgive me.

I love you.

Thank you.

Michael the Archangel Prayer:

An oldie moldy from my Catholic upbringing. Again, pray this prayer TO the fears and unhealed wounds within yourself. Feel free to change the language to fit your own personal beliefs:

Michael the Archangel, defend us in battle.

Be our protection against the wickedness and snares of the devil.

May God rebuke him we humbly pray; and do Thou,

O Prince of the Heavenly Host, by the Power of God,

cast into hell Satan and all the evil spirits,

who prowl through the world seeking the ruin of souls.

Amen.

If you have other tools that you have found to be helpful, please share them in the comment section below!  We are all here to take part of the healing of humanity so that one day we can all truly be free!

This is Our Fate

/ Lauri Ann Lumby / Leave a comment

For the past five days I have been trying to put into words the collective horror over last Thursday’s presidential debate. First, I had to be present to my body as it processed the empathic reaction to collective trauma – manifesting in my body as vertigo, headaches, and deep profound fatigue. Panic also paid me a visit. Then I had to navigate the tangled forest of illusions and projections, pulling back from my own temptation to point fingers, name-call, and cast blame. Finally, I had to pull away the veil of distractions that wanted to draw me into political analysis. Only after all of this was I able to arrive at what is truly happening at the root of the hatred, chaos, and separation we are witnessing from outside ourselves so that my words might help support us with a way forward, and if not a way forward – at least a way through.

To put it simply, the presidential debate and our reactions to it have nothing to do with Donald Trump, Joe Biden, or the future of our nation. Instead, the debate and the presidential election is simply a reflection of America’s fate and by association, the fate of all of humanity. In other words, in perfect clarity, the debate showed us that unless we, as a collective, make some clear and drastic changes, we are wholly and completely f*cked!

We are f*cked, not because of who might be president, but because of all the fear, separation, selfishness, greed, bigotry, and hatred that has brought us to this place – all of which is self-created. We have done this to ourselves. Out of our own unacknowledged fears and unhealed trauma, we have created separation where separation need not exist. We have privileged ourselves over others. We have taken more than we needed while depriving others of the very things they need to survive. We have cast dispersions on our fellow-humans simply because we perceive them to be different. We have created hatred of others based on skin color, gender, sexual orientation, race, nationality, religion, body shape and size, and every other way we have chosen to discriminate against others. We have destroyed our environment for the sake of greed. We judge others for their education or lack thereof. We despise others simply out of jealousy. We want what we don’t have and despise what we do. We take from others. We kill to get what we want. We wage war on other nations, or even within our own nation, simply because we want what we perceive others to have. We destroy entire races of people simply because we can.

Humanity has done a really shitty job of being human. Now, it seems, we’re getting what we deserve. Everything we despise in “the other” is a reflection of what is unhealed within ourselves and the Universe will continue to bring this hatred and separation before us until we figure our shit out. At one time it was hatred toward the Jews. Then it was hatred toward Muslims. Then it was hatred of Arabs. Then it was hatred of blacks. Then it was hatred of Mexicans. Then it was hatred toward the poor. Then it was hatred toward women. Then it was hatred toward homosexuals. Then it was hatred toward transgendered humans. Then it was hatred toward Republicans. Then it was hatred toward Democrats. Then it was hatred toward conservatives. Then it was hatred toward liberals.

“Fear. Separation. Hate.  Fear. Separation. Hate.”  This is the mantra humanity seems to live by. Until we heal this fear and its resulting separation, we will never truly be free, and we will never know the peace and safety we all desperately long for. To heal this fear, separation, and hatred, we have to turn our gaze inward and away from all the projected blame outside of us. We have to stop blaming and fearing others and look deeply at ourselves. We have to learn to sit with our fears and be present to our discomfort. We have to be courageously honest with ourselves – our own hatreds – and examine their cause. In what ways have we suffered disappointment and pain? How have we been the recipient of another’s unhealed wounds? In what ways have we forgotten that we are Love? Then we have to get really intimate with these wounds (seeking help and support where needed) within ourselves and in doing so, allowing them to find healing. Only in doing the deep work of healing ourselves and encouraging and supporting others in doing the same can we ever hope to experience peace in our world. Until that time, we will continue to suffer the consequences of our own unhealed wounds.

This is our fate. We have done this to ourselves. Collectively we have the power to undo it, but we may be running out of time. As such it is urgent that we stop projecting blame outward and start taking a look at ourselves. This alone is where our power resides – not in any of the distractions outside of us which are simply reminders of the inner work we still have left to do. Yes, we have the power to change our world, but first it starts with ourselves.

The Journey of Healing Ourselves

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Exactly Where I Wanted to Be

/ Lauri Ann Lumby / Leave a comment

This morning I find myself feeling a little bit like the fairytale heroine who went out looking for her soul’s longing only to wake up one day to realize she already had it and has had it for quite some time.

This is exactly where I find myself with the realization that has been a long-time coming in the midst of me already living it. Who knew?

My soul knew!  The longing has been there for as long as I can remember – even without my young self being able to give it words. Based on the models in which I was raised, the words I can now give to what my soul has longed for (and as it turns out has already been living) is: MONASTIC LIVING – in the modern world.

As it turns out, my home is my “monastery.” My practice is my “church.” My showing up in the world is my way of being of service to humanity. 

These things I have always known, but not in a way that allowed me to fully embrace it. Instead, I’ve been wiggling and writhing through the conditioned ego-attachments of our culture which dictate our understandings of success as defined by material wealth, notoriety, and power.

Additionally, I’ve had to wage an inner battle with pop culture spirituality that tells us the only work that matters is that which bears a certain appearance and comes in a particular package. Nowhere in this model are we told that EVERYTHING we do has the potential to be a kind of service to humanity – everything from my office manager work at the ballet studio to my frequent visits to my favorite coffee shop, to showing up to yoga class, posting on social media, or grocery shopping. True service is not about what we do, but how we are showing up as Love (compassion, joy, peace, gentleness, insight, counsel, companionship, care, etc.) in the world.

Monastic living in the modern world is exactly what I’ve been doing and increasingly so since being given an opportunity to fully immerse myself during the Covid-19 shutdown in 2020. The Covid-19 shutdown fulfilled my longing and I was one of those screaming “NOOOOOOOO” when the shutdown was brought to an end and I had to return to the “real world.” As it turns out, the real world is just as monastic as being locked in my home for three months – I just needed to find my way through the tangled forest of ego attachments and cultural conditioning to realize it.

As it turns out I’ve not only been creating, but actually living my monastic life all along!  I’m already exactly where I’ve long said I wanted to be.

Happy Star Wars Day!

/ Lauri Ann Lumby / Leave a comment

A Message from the Force


How could I not acknowledge the popular Star Wars meme on this auspicious, tongue-in-cheek day?  Especially since Star Wars (the original one) is my all-time favorite movie (Mary Poppins being a very close second). 

Whether you are a fan or not, Star Wars is the quintessential tale of good vs. evil through the lens of the heroes journey – specifically capitalizing on the orphan trope with obvious overtones/undertones of George Lucas’ Catholic upbringing including narratives about “God,” temptation, death and resurrection. Throw in the spaghetti western action sequences and innovative special effects (that still hold their own today) and Star Wars has it all. 

Critics will say there is nothing original in the Star Wars universe. Book nerds will suggest Lucas stole all his ideas from Dune. Neither of these criticisms are incorrect. Regardless of these critiques, Star Wars (the original) holds a unique place in the cinematic universe as a profound teacher of wisdom – subliminal wisdom at that!

Beyond the special effects, the action, the glitz, and the glamour, Star Wars is the story of our young orphan hero (Luke Skywalker) being supported in coming into his own power. By way of Obi-Wan Kenobi (and later Yoda) Luke learns that the power he seeks is within and around him in what is called The Force.  The Force, he learns, is the power that created and guides the whole universe and is accessible to those who seek it out. He discovers that The Force can be used for good, but that it can be equally harnessed for the sake of evil. Along the journey he is confronted with all the ways in which he could use this power and is challenged to make the right choice. Does he use The Force to commit acts of revenge, or does he use it as a force for good? 

The journey that Luke embarks upon and the choices he must face, represent the universal human journey. As it specifically relates to us in this time in history, during this critical stage of human evolution, Star Wars invites us to explore:

1) Our own relationship to The Force (God, Source, Love, etc.)
2) The conditioning that tells us The Force is outside of us and it’s approval must be earned and might be taken away.
4) The temptation to look outside of ourselves for a teacher or a guide/ truth, knowledge and wisdom.
5) The temptation to give our power away to outside perceived authorities. 
6) The temptation to use our gifts (The Force) to manipulate others or to have power over them.
7) The temptation to act out of anger or revenge. 

As I reflect on this today, the most obvious lesson from Star Wars that presents itself is related to the “outside perceived authority” – especially those who use their positions of perceived power to harm others. In this I think of:

The media.
Government officials.
Religions “leaders.”
Self-proclaimed and false gurus. 

Our world is overrun by those who seek to manipulate others through false information, fear-based communication, and shame. Those who capitalize on human insecurity and the conditioning that tells us to believe those outside of us over our own inner wisdom and knowledge. As it relates to the work I do in the world, I am currently most aware of (and annoyed by) the false gurus and charlatans in the fields of healing and spirituality. Individuals who are taking advantage of human vulnerability, placing themselves in the position of authority/guru/source of healing, and convincing their followers to give them loads of money along with devotion to their guidance – even (especially) when the “guru’s” guidance is in direct conflict with what the “client/follower” might feel/know within themselves. I can’t tell you how many people I have seen harmed (financially, emotionally, mentally, even physically) by these false gurus. And yet, these gurus continue to attract followers like flies are attracted to rotting flesh.

In this journey of human evolution, like Luke when he was given the opportunity to choose the Dark Side through revenge, we stand at a crossroads. To whom are we giving our allegiance? Are we giving it away to outside perceived authorities?  Are we believing the lies we are often fed by the media, corporations, our church, our government? Or, are we giving our allegiance TO OURSELVES – to The Force that dwells within us, that guides us, leads us, compels us toward our own inner knowledge, wisdom and inner power?  Not unlike “Young Luke,” the fate of the universe (humanity) depends on our choice.

My hope and prayer for all of us is the acknowledgement that THE FORCE IS WITH YOU and is ALWAYS WITH YOU.   Now the invitation is to harness that Force and direct it toward good. 

Yours in the Force,
Lauri