shadow

The Collective Shadow of the US

/ Lauri Ann Lumby / Leave a comment

On Wednesday, January 7, 2026, around 9:30 in the morning, Renee Nicole Good of Minneapolis was murdered by an ICE agent, shot in the face when she refused to comply with his unlawful order. The murder took place in the residential area of East 34th Street and South Portland Avenue in the Powderhorn Park neighborhood. Minneapolis, and all the world with them are mourning this tragedy and angered at the gross miscarriage of justice that would allow a mostly untrained officer to execute a mother of three without cause.

As the story continues to unfold, the whole world is watching and wondering, will this finally be the tipping point the United States needs to get out from under this reign of terror?

Sadly, I suspect not. If those in positions of perceived authority haven’t acted yet, I doubt the killing of an innocent white woman will motivate them to do anything now. Not because our so-called elected officials are evil (though some, including me, might argue this point), but because they, and the system they continue to support, are simply a reflection of the collective unacknowledged, and therefore unhealed shadow of this nation.

The ICE agent, yet to be named as of this writing, who murdered Renee Nicole Good, is like the characterization of most ICE agents: an angry, racist, possibly sexist, white man who is projecting his own fears and insecurities on those he has been told, and believes, are the cause of his suffering. Apparently women are included among those he hates. Or, woefully untrained in how to manage conflict or how to de-escalate a crisis, reacted out of panic or fear in shooting the mother of three who refused to comply with his unlawful requests.

Or maybe he shot her simply because she had the courage to say no.

We may never know what drove the ICE agent to kill Renee Good, but we can guess at the knee-jerk reaction that would incite anyone to even draw a gun.

The ICE agent reflects our shadow. He IS our shadow.

As I’ve said before, the United States was firmly established in misogyny and racism. Whereas policies have been implemented and laws passed that give us the illusion of freedom and equality, as any woman or person of color will tell you, we are not truly free. Neither are we treated equally under the law. In order for the United States to heal and become the dream it has presented to the world, it first has to acknowledge this truth, along with all the other truths the US does not want to admit. As Hasan Piker stated in a recent podcast, “The United States is the biggest terrorist of all time.”  He’s not wrong. Terror from the inside and terror on the outside. And until we address these difficult truths, we will never heal, and nothing will ever change.

Rest in peace Renee Nicole Good and may justice one day be served.

Unleashing Your Light

/ Lauri Ann Lumby / Leave a comment

We will never truly be free until we confront our shadow.  The shadow is all of the parts of ourselves that have not been fully integrated: 

  • Everything we have denied.
  • Everything we suppress.
  • Everything we repress.
  • All the parts of ourselves we judge as negative so we hide them away from the world.
  • Our unacknowledged fears.
  • Our unhealed wounds.
  • The parts of our nature, personality or temperament that we reject.
  • The parts of ourselves we hide as they are judged as unworthy by our society.

The challenge with the shadow is that (as the Buddhists say), “What we resist will persist.”  Hiding, ignoring, denying, imprisoning, bargaining away these parts of ourselves actually does the opposite.  Instead of staying hidden, these parts of ourselves come out sideways – often in non-loving behaviors toward ourselves or others. 

If we do not confront our shadow and do the difficult work of bringing it to the light so that it can be healed, transformed and re-integrated, then we will never be free.  Without doing our shadow work, we will be forever condemned to “a life of quiet desperation” and our lives will amount to nothing because until we are free we will never know peace.

But herein lays the challenge.  Few are willing to stand toe to toe with their own inner demons and even fewer have the courage to keep standing there until all their wounds are healed and they are truly free.  Instead, they would rather avoid the shadow work while chasing after shiny objects – the illusion of achievement, success, money, power, and fame.  In the meantime, their shadow is coming out sideways, hurting themselves and all the people around them.  In the end, what they resist will be their demise.

Courses for Unleashing Your Light

The Dangers of Spiritual Bypass

/ Lauri Ann Lumby / Leave a comment

Spiritual bypass can best be described as: “the tendency to use spiritual ideas and practices to sidestep or avoid facing unresolved emotional issues, psychological wounds, and unfinished developmental tasks”

(Welwood, J. (2000) [1984]. “Between heaven and earth: principles of inner work”. Toward a psychology of awakening: Buddhism, psychotherapy, and the path of personal and spiritual transformation. Boston: Shambhala Publications. pp. 11–21.).

In spiritual bypass, we avoid, ignore, deny, suppress and repress the challenges, difficulties, disappointments, and suffering that are inherent within the human condition.  Spiritual bypass also includes avoidance and denial of the shadow.  The shadow is made up of our unhealed wounds, unacknowledged fears and includes all the aspects of ourselves that we have rejected because we have deemed them unacceptable. 

Spiritual bypass takes many forms, but in essence the action is the same – hoping, believing, acting as if we can simply meditate, pray, chant, or positively affirmation our struggles away.  The universal outcome of spiritual bypass is always the same and is best articulated in the Buddhist saying, “What we resist will persist.”  Through spiritual bypass, we are not dealing with, confronting, healing or transforming anything; we are simply sweeping it under the rug. As is true of everything we avoid, deny, ignore, the rug can only hold so much.  The rug will eventually explode and everything we have shoved under it will come out to haunt us.  Even if we are successful in keeping it all under the rug, what we have resisted and ignored will find its way out sideways – usually in non-loving behaviors toward ourselves or others. Often these behaviors become compulsive (ie: addictions), are disproportionate or uncharacteristic of our true nature.   

Some very clear examples of spiritual bypass and the negative consequence of this pattern of behavior includes: the clergy sex abuse crisis, narcissistic behaviors, abuse, co-dependency, homophobia, violence against children, school shootings and other forms of terrorism.  What we resist will persist and what we suppress will find its way out whether we want it to or not.  I would further suggest that we are currently living in a world seriously caught up in its own bypass – ignoring, denying, projecting away the darkness and pretending that it is all ok when in fact it is not!  Societal bypass is exhibited in our divisive culture where many refuse to see the truth that is staring them in the face because it makes them feel uncomfortable (triggering their own unacknowledged anxiety or unhealed fears), or who instead of acknowledging their role in darkness that exists in our society, either ignore it or project the blame onto someone else.  The bottom line is that we cannot meditate, mantra, pray, “beam love,” think good thoughts, repeat positive affirmations, “La La” the darkness away. Until we learn to face our darkness (individually and collectively) we are guilty of bypass and the darkness will not only persist, it will become worse. 

Now, I will wholeheartedly admit that I am not innocent as it relates to spiritual bypass.   I too have ventured down its path.  I will admit that it felt good there – for awhile – but eventually it kicked my ass! I have since learned that the only way out is through.  If we want to be free of our inner fears, unhealed wounds, and perceived imperfections, we have to go deep into them, feel them, wallow in them, and THEN through our spiritual practices, find our way through them.  In this, we are not covering the darkness with the light; neither are we turning the darkness into the light.  Instead, we are finding the light that is already present within the darkness – if only we have the courage to go there.

The work of dealing with our shadow and confronting all that is broken within us is hard!  It requires personal accountability, self-knowledge, courageous honesty, humility, vulnerability, and discipline.  It also requires the understanding and belief that in the overall scheme of things, what we are tempted to call “darkness” is in fact our light.  Within the struggle, suffering, struggles, challenges and all the things we want to deny or reject about our human experience is there to serve the light.  It is within these perceived challenges where we find our greatest gifts. 

Confronting Shadow

Both Overcoming Obstacles and our Enneagram Intensive support you in identifying and transforming your shadow. These courses are not about by-pass, they are about confronting, passing into, and through. Click on the images below to learn more.