Sexualizing the Magdalene

January 21, 2026 / Lauri Ann Lumby / 3 Comments

In short – DON’T!

I just finished reading a book that was recently recommended to me about Mary Magdalene. I will start by saying it was a good recommendation. There were parts of the book that resonated with me on some level. At the same time, there were portions of the narrative that DID NOT resonate with me at all. In fact, I found them disturbing and unsettling. They triggered rage in me. Rage over the following question:

Why do some authors find it necessary to sexualize the Magdalene to tell her story?

I admit, my NOVEL, Song of the Beloved – the Gospel According to Mary Magdalene included an experience of sexual assault, and an experience between Jesus and Mary Magdalene in their marriage bed was hinted at, but in my mind, there is a difference between including the realities of the human journey (ie: 1 out of 4 women have experienced sexual assault) and describing the source of the Magdalene’s power as dependent on her beauty and what is and what is done between her legs. Perhaps this is all about my Venus in Capricorn, but I find the sexualizing of the Magdalene insulting and gross.

Can sexual intimacy be a beautiful, even transcendent spiritual experience through which one might encounter “God?” Absolutely. Is it a necessary, even required component in one’s spiritual awakening and personal empowerment? History tells us no. Is it possible that Mary Magdalene and Jesus, in addition to being emotionally, spiritually, and psychologically intimate, experienced sexual intimacy – absolutely. Whereas there exists no scholarly evidence to support that Jesus and Mary Magdalene were married (or had children), this too is not beyond possibility.

With none of this do I take issue. I do, however, take issue with authors who use sex to sell their Magdalene stories. First, it’s lazy. Then I find myself offended. I find myself especially disgusted when authors choose to describe both sexual assault and “spiritual initiation” in unnecessarily explicit detail – and then try to pass it off as truth.

In sexualizing the Magdalene, these authors are no better than early Church leaders (specifically Pope Gregory I (540-604 C.E.)), who claimed the Magdalene to be the sinful woman mentioned in the gospels, a claim that has no foundation in scripture, but is still the common belief today.

Despite the efforts of scholars and laypeople alike, the Magdalene continues to be judged as less-than, when in fact, she was a woman of power, near-equal (if not equal) to Jesus. Moreover, as was the case with Pope Gregory, it is her sexuality by which she has been judged. Modern authors have continued this trend by attempting to sanctify women’s sexuality by suggesting it is the source of her power. This is both an insult and an assault against both women and men. Our personal power has nothing to do with sex.

To further describe the so-called hiero-gamos as a necessary step in human enlightenment reduces human beings to simply sexual creatures. To say it is by manual or coital manipulation that one becomes awakened is a corruption of the purpose of both sexual intimacy and the human journey of self-realization. To say that either Mary Magdalene or Jesus reached the height of their awakening solely through sexual rituals diminishes the inherent power of both. To remove sexual intimacy from love, insults the very mission that Jesus and Mary Magdalene were trying to accomplish.

The Source of Mary Magdalene’s power (and Jesus’ for that matter) had nothing to do with her appearance, her desirability to men, or with her sexual nature. The Source of Mary Magdalene’s power was within – in the Love that she had come to know as herself, and the Love she was in the world. This Being Love is the message and purpose of the Magdalene. To suggest anything else is to have missed the whole entire point.

Teachings of the Magdalene

Not for the Masses

January 4, 2026 / Lauri Ann Lumby / 2 Comments

For years I have struggled to understand and make peace with the reality that very few people are attracted to the Magdalene work that I provide, and even fewer complete it. Now I get it:

The Magdalene is not for the masses!

While likely hundreds of books have been published in her name and a similar number of online resources are available, many of which offer their own versions of “Magdalene training” or offer retreats and pilgrimages in the name of the Magdalene, it is not to the resources and support I provide where people tend to gravitate. Formerly, I took this personally. Now, I acknowledge it as a victory of sorts – a victory, not for myself, but a victory for those who are called to the work I facilitate, especially to those who complete it.

The work of the Magdalene was never meant to be easy. Neither is it something to be entered into lightly for the purposes of puffing up the ego or making oneself feel special. If it was a challenge for Mary, who earned the title of Magdalene through her commitment to and mastery of these teachings, so shall it be for those who courageously embark upon this journey.

It was not to the masses, nor to the other disciples that the risen Christ was revealed. Neither were any of the other disciples ordained to continue the depth work facilitated by Jesus. It was only to Mary, called Magdalene, that these things were given.

The work of the Magdalene is hard. It requires discipline, tenacity, persistence, and a 100% commitment to radical personal accountability. The journey Mary completed under Jesus’ tutelage revealed to her the path through which one is able to overcome the inner demons (fears, unhealed wounds, societal conditioning) that prevent one from knowing their true nature as Love in Union with the All. With single-minded focus, Mary confronted each and every unhealed wound, false perception, non-loving conditioning, and fear which blocked her way from knowing this Love and in doing so, became the embodiment of Love – as Jesus himself had done. There is no other direct follower of Jesus said to have completed this work (with the possible exception of John – though recent scholarship suggests the writings attributed to John may in fact, have come from, Mary, herself).

As Mary’s accomplishment was rare, so has it been throughout history. It is only our pop-culture spirituality that might suggest otherwise. Contrary to mass-marketed spirituality, enlightenment cannot be bought. It can only be uncovered in bits and pieces as we diligently tend to every single obstacle to Love – including (especially) ourselves. This is not the work for the faint of heart. Instead, we must look in the mirror with excruciating scrutiny:

What are the lies we’ve told ourselves?
What are the attachments we’ve formed?
How are we feeding our egos with dreams of popularity, fame, power, or wealth?
Where are we making excuses for our inhumanity to our fellow human beings?
Where are we harboring hatred?
How are we hiding our true selves for the sake of other people’s approval?
Where are we depriving ourselves of the things we need to fit into the status quo?
How have we bought into capitalistic deceptions and in what ways have we sold our soul to “make it?”
What are the sensitivities we’ve ignored, the reactions we’ve excused, or the violence we’ve justified – toward others and to ourselves?

Few, I have found, are willing to be so honest, and fewer still are willing to accept the kind of accountability that true transformation requires. And that’s ok. Like Jesus, the Magdalene wears many faces – a symbol for some, an inspiration for others, and to those called to the depths – a psychopomp leading them on a journey through the underworld where their wounds may be transformed and their truest light revealed.

My most-recommended books on the Magdalene:

Bourgeault, Cynthia, The Meaning of Mary Magdalene – Discovering the Woman at the Heart of Christianity, Shambhala Publications, 2010.

DeQuillan, Jehanne, The Gospel of the Beloved Companion, Athara Editions, 2010.

Leloup, Jean-Yves, The Gospel of Mary Magdalene, Inner Traditions, 2002.

The Things We Cling To

December 2, 2025 / Lauri Ann Lumby / Leave a comment

The journey toward self-actualization, enlightenment, individuation, and personal mastery (all words meaning essentially the same thing) is rough. In our western, capitalistic culture in which personal development has been commoditized, we’ve been told to expect unicorns and rainbows, when instead, we are faced with hellfire and brimstone. Personal mastery is not for the faint of heart. Neither is it for the weak. Instead, it requires persistence, discipline, and the willingness to confront and lay down every attachment and mask that hides us from our true selves.

Our true self is LOVE. Period.

Another way of describing the journey is the transformation of every single thing within us that has forgotten we are love. In doing so, we are simultaneously remembering how to love ourselves for all that we are – warts and all.

Self-actualization is not about perfection. Instead, it is about becoming increasingly aware of our human frailty and loving even that.

In coming to recognize, acknowledge, accept and love our imperfect perfection, we are invited to identify and release all the things we cling to that stand in the way of radical self-love. Much of what we cling to has been beaten into us by our culture. Some have surfaced out of past woundings. Many emerge out of trauma. Others we cling to simply because we are human. Here is my list of the things we cling to that are often the most difficult to release:

The desire to belong.
The need for approval from others.
The longing to be seen.
The yearning to be heard.
The need to be right.
The desire to know.
The need to be in control.
The yearning to be desired.
The habits, patterns, behaviors, status to which we have become familiar.
The illusion of success.
Conditioned beliefs about value and achievement.
Our health.
Life.

The truth of the human experience is that everything is temporary and nothing can be controlled. We are not here to make other people happy. Neither are we here to gain other people’s approval. Belonging is an illusion, and it is only the false self that needs to be seen, heard, or loved. Our value is not dependent on any one else’s definition or rules of measurement.

We have value, and are loved, simply because we are. When we remember the Love that we are, and release these attachments, only then are we free enough to love ourselves for all that we are, and to see that love in others – no matter how broken we or the other might appear.

Releasing the things we cling to most stubbornly brings us into the field of personal mastery. There might not be unicorns or rainbows here, but there is true and enduring freedom.

Tools for Releasing Attachments

Perfection vs. Wholeness

November 4, 2025 / Lauri Ann Lumby / Leave a comment

There exists a major flaw in the new age, self-improvement, enlightenment, and ascension industries:

The goal of human development is not perfection.

Instead, it is wholeness.

Wholeness means that we are content and grounded in ourselves “warts and all.” Whereas we may be ever-striving for personal growth, individuation, and self-actualization, we have moved beyond picking apart and shaming ourselves for the inherent imperfections of being human. While self-awareness and personal accountability provide evidence of psychological and emotional maturity, wholeness allows for the fact that mistakes will still occur and that our value is not diminished by those mistakes. Wholeness empowers us to understand that the mind is going to do what the mind is meant to do – which is to keep us safe, and that our thoughts alone have absolutely nothing to do with the events of our lives. We have gained the wisdom in acknowledging that life happens and that we are neither the creator nor the destroyer of our fate. When illness or tragedy strike, we allow ourselves time and space for grieving without the added burden of the shame-based beliefs that these were somehow our fault because of our thinking or punishment for something we did “wrong.”

Wholeness understands that life itself is neutral and free from judgment. Life is not out to get people. Neither does life choose favorites. Each human being is here for their own journey – a journey that really has nothing to do with our own. Wholeness leaves each to their own. This does not mean, however, that in wholeness we don’t judge, condemn, curse, or rage about the actions of another. This is simply us being human. Life doesn’t judge. Humans do.

Wholeness allows for the gritty aspects of our humanness. Whereas we may be actively pursuing a reduction in judgement (of self and others), a decrease in anxiety, a lessening of rage, a dwindling of jealousy, we recognize that we are not here to be perfect, we are here to be human.

As human beings, we are perfectly imperfect. So what if we rage on about the injustices in our world, or hold grudges against those who have harmed us? None of these means we have failed in our desire to ascend, grow in enlightenment, or become self-actualized. In fact, if we can forgive ourselves of our humanness, and take each “mistake” as a lesson, then we have successfully grown in wholeness.

Wholeness, not perfection is the purpose of the human journey. Isn’t it time we shake free of the burden of shame, including that which has been heaped upon us by a self-help industry wrapped up in its own illusions of perfection while denying people of the Love that they already are?

Enriching Your Practice

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Energy Vampires, Succubae, and Witch Collectors

October 28, 2025 / Lauri Ann Lumby / Leave a comment

As I’ve been trying to figure out how to write on the topic of “authentic power,” I came upon this article that I first penned in 2019. Then it was titled, “Beware of Witch Collectors.” I have since come to broaden this topic to include anyone who feeds off the power of those who are authentically gifted, because the one who feeds has no power of their own. It seems fitting to share this re-write here rather than to try to create something new as this does a great job of summing things up while providing the necessary cautions. Enjoy!

This one is for my sister-witches and brother-witches. When I use the term “witch” I’m referring to the women and men I know who have harnessed the infinite power within themselves and who are using this power to support their own life mission of being in service to the betterment of our world. These are people who are strong, independent, confident (albeit sometimes insecure – only because they have rarely been supported or affirmed in their gifts), intuitive, empathic, teachers, healers, leaders and behind the scene witches. These are the ones who have been with us throughout eternity and who have been ridiculed, condemned, even killed for their magical gifts. Fortunately we are no longer in the “burning times” but that doesn’t mean that today’s witches are free from danger. In fact, the dangers we face today are even more subtle and insidious than the dangers we faced during the witch trials and the inquisition. Today I wish to speak of one specific danger that faces all people of authentic power today – and that is of what I like to call Energy Vampires, Succubae, and Witch Collectors.”

Succubae are individuals who appear powerful, confident, strong, self-assured, perhaps even a bit arrogant. They are often physically attractive and lure people in with their charm. At first they seem sincere, trustworthy and of integrity, but it is all a ruse. What they show to the world is an illusion for what hides behind the mask is an energy vampire – one who is not strong at all, but terribly insecure and lacking in inner power.

Motivated by a deep sense of emptiness and vacancy, Energy Vampires and Witch Collectors are compelled to seek out and then draw in those of authentic power so they can suck them dry. In the world of psychology, these people are often called narcissists, but in my experience, their “condition” moves far beyond that of a borderline personality disorder. Unlike narcissists, succubae desire more than power and control. They literally feed on the life-force energy of those whose power is authentic and who they have drawn into their clutches. The problem with this “relationship” is that the Witch Collector is never satisfied – can never be satisfied – as there is no amount of “witch power” that can fill a vacant hole. They may feel temporary satisfaction from the energy they have drained, but the emptiness within an energy vampire/witch collector is like a black hole – infinitely empty and impossible to fill. As long as the relationship continues between witch collector and witch, the witch collector will feed and the witch will feel drained –unable to harness the fullness of her power and to use that power for good.

Identifying a witch collector is tricky business, especially if you are one who is still nursing the wounds of the unholy masculine. In a culture which has been ruled for the past 5000 years by the unholy masculine (fear, power and control), most of us harbor this wound. As a result, we long to be seen, heard, acknowledged and supported in the use of our gifts. When we find the rare individual who celebrates our gifts – who speaks our language – we are thrilled. Titillated actually! In our excitement, we are tempted to set aside our shield of caution and discernment gets tossed to the wind. We enthusiastically enter into the web, blind to the true motivation of their seduction. This is how seduction works, speaking to our insecurities, fears and unhealed wounds, which then causes us to put down our guard. Then the “witch hunter” moves in for the “kill.”

But there is hope. We are not defenseless in the face of energy vampires, succubae or witch collectors. The first step is recognition – looking for and seeking out those in our lives who are parasites. Once we identify them, they no longer have power over us. Say NO to their seductions and their ministrations. STOP being the host for their insatiable desire for power. Remember that in truth, they HAVE NO POWER. We are the ones with the power and it is our power they seek to possess. See them. Say no to them. Cut them off from their food-source. And then watch them slink away. This is what I have found in my own experience with witch collectors – once they know they are being seen for who they truly are, once we refuse to let them take our power, once we say NO to their seductions, they simply go off in search of their next victim.

Addendum: An important note as it relates to succubae, etc. is the matter of power. In this world, there are two kinds of power. The one in which we are most familiar is the power that is wielded by the system. This is power-over. One seeking to have power over another. This is power that is distorted and (dare I say) evil. This kind of power is gained through manipulation, most commonly using shame, guilt, threats and triggering one’s insecurities and fears for the purposes of gain. Institutions use this. Governments use this. Corporations use this. The advertising industry is defined by this kind of power. Despots and dictators thrive on this kind of insidious power, as do individuals. Many so-called healers, teachers, shamans, etc. use these kinds of manipulations to gain clients, wealth, and fame. This kind of power is false and ultimately temporary. This kind of power does not satisfy. It only leaves the wielder of it constantly wanting more.

Authentic power is something else entirely. Authentic power springs naturally and without effort from one who is in union with Source (that which some might call “God”) and living in harmony with Source guidance. We are all born with authentic power, but our life experiences often limit our access to that power via the woundings and traumas we experience in the human condition. As we do the inner work of healing those traumas, our authentic power becomes more accessible. It is out of this power that our Divine gifts emerge, and it is our connection to this power that allows us to humbly allow Source to live through us. When living from authentic power, we are naturally and effortlessly guided to where we need to be, and what we are being called to do. We find ourselves grounded in ourselves, content in who we are, and at peace with what life brings to us. Those who would benefit from the gifts we share are naturally drawn to us and find us without any effort on our part. When grounded in authentic power, we are also able to see more clearly those who are not interested in growing or healing through the sharing of our gifts, but who instead seek only to feed off us. When in authentic power, from these we are able to simply walk away.

Accessing our Authentic Power begins with identifying and healing the wounds and traumas that are blocking that power. Our training programs help support you in that transformation. Click on the images to learn more.

Spiritual Appropriation and White Privilege

October 20, 2025 / Lauri Ann Lumby / 2 Comments

Today I write with a question for our community. It is a question about which I welcome and invite your response. The question is about spiritual appropriation and white (colonizer) privilege. When seeking definitions related to this topic, I found Google to be the most succinct:

Cultural appropriation is the adoption of elements from a minority culture by a dominant culture in a way that is disrespectful, exploitative, or that strips the cultural element of its original meaning. A key factor in identifying appropriation is the power imbalance between the dominant and minority cultures, where the dominant group benefits from something that the marginalized group may be mocked or punished for.

Key Characteristics

Power Imbalance:

The act often occurs when a dominant culture borrows from a marginalized or minority culture, leveraging its power to gain benefits from the culture it is borrowing from.

Disrespect and Exploitation:

Elements are taken without understanding their significance, which can strip them of their original meaning or turn them into a stereotype.

Lack of Credit or Compensation:

The dominant group may profit from or receive credit for cultural elements, without acknowledging their source or providing compensation to the marginalized group.

Reinforcing Oppression:

The act can reinforce harmful stereotypes or contribute to the oppression of the marginalized group.

I have seen examples of this throughout my spiritual journey – from people of white, European descent taking on rituals and practices of indigenous people or adopting devotional practices that originated in West Africa and arrived here through slave-trade. I have admittedly been somewhat guilty of this myself as my spiritual journey guided me toward teachers and scriptures, rituals and practice that are not of my own Catholic, Western European ancestry.

Appropriation becomes a difficult question, especially for descendants of colonizers who in the melting pot of the United States, Australia, New Zealand, and Canada, find ourselves in cultures without a culture. In the journey of trying to find ourselves, we are also looking for what defines us and speaks to us as a culture. In this exploration, it is natural to seek outside the (mostly Christian) traditions that were handed down to us through our ancestry.

But in exploring these non-white, non-Christian traditions, beliefs, and practice, when does it become appropriation?

In responding to this question, I can only speak for myself, and the answer comes several-fold:

The first part of my response is in the fact that in every “other” tradition/practice I have explored, I was always brought back to what I already know and which I can authentically claim as part of my own ancestry. In exploring, I have found truths and teachings that mirror and deepen what I have learned through my own Catholic/Christian contemplative practices. Through Eastern wisdom literature, for example, my adherence to Jesus’ teachings on oneness, love, etc. has only become more sure.
Fact: the Catholic Church is one of the first and worst colonizers of indigenous people. Catholic rituals have their roots in Judaism, Hellenism, the Roman culture, and the existing pre-Christian communities of the Mediterranean basin, and Western Europe. In its march west and north, the Catholic Church gobbled up (appropriated) the traditions and practices of the people they sought to subjugate. As my Celtic/Irish ancestors were one of those most targeted, I feel entitled to reclaiming these rituals and practices for myself without apology. If the frame drum (bodhran) and Irish female Shamanism is a part of my ancestry, then I feel it is not only my right, but my duty, to reclaim it.
If, in the context of my professional work, I find myself sharing a practice or ritual from a culture outside my own (which is rare), I give credit along with the name of those from whom I learned the practice and/or was given permission to share.
I really, really, really try to stay in my own lane. Hence, the use of primarily Judeo-Christian contemplative practices, Judeo-Christian scripture (canonical and otherwise), and Judeo-Christian or Irish ritual practices. If it’s not from my ancestors, or the tradition in which I was raised, I don’t feel I have a right to it.
Now, there are two roads for me where walking the fine line of spiritual appropriation as a person of white European ancestry gets a little tricky. Yoga and Pre-Christian/Jewish mysticism (ie: the Kabbalah). I practice yoga. I have studied Vedic teachings and thought. I have been trained in chakra theory. I participate in Vedic chant and kirtan. From original source material, I have been a devoted student of Kabbalah and have utilized both the Practical and Mystical Kabbalah for my own spiritual development. I, unfortunately, have not had access to the guidance of a Rabbinical teacher of Kabbalah. Neither have I studied under the guidance of an Indian Vedic guru. These latter two points are probably a good thing as I could never become so arrogant in either field as to claim expertise. As I openly say to my students and friends who have explored these topics with me, “I don’t even know enough to get myself in trouble

Again, I bring this topic forward for community discussion and exploration. For me, I think the line between spiritual appreciation and spiritual appropriation lays in questions of ancestry and use. For me, ancestry is clear. Use is maybe a little less clear. Am I financially benefiting from something I learned from another culture? Maybe. Sometimes. Am I giving proper credit to the origin of what I share? Hopefully always! Am I causing harm to the originating culture in the sharing and use of these practices? I sure hope not.

As a person of white, European, colonizer ancestry, I feel it is critically important that we ask ourselves these questions. I will also admit the answers are sometimes unclear and we might make mistakes along the way.

I welcome your thoughts and reflections on this topic!

Thank you!

With love,

Lauri

The Secular Modern Monastic

October 14, 2025 / Lauri Ann Lumby / Leave a comment

Well, I had planned on presenting this topic in my own words, but as it turns out, Google did a much better job:

A secular modern monastic is a person who lives a life of discipline, prayer, and service within the secular world, without adhering to traditional religious rules like celibacy or cloistered living. These individuals find spiritual fulfillment through practices like meditation, mindfulness, and a commitment to self-improvement or community work, often within the context of their existing family and career lives. This approach emphasizes spiritual practices over religious dogma and is sometimes seen as an alternative to traditional religion for those who still seek a disciplined and purpose-driven life.

Key characteristics

Integration into modern life:

Rather than leaving society, secular monastics practice their spirituality within it, engaging in daily activities with a monastic mindset.

Focus on self-improvement:

A common theme is working on oneself, which can include practices like meditation and personal development.

Service-oriented:

Like traditional monks, secular monastics often engage in acts of service, though their methods are adapted to a modern context.

Community-based:

Some groups form communities that support each other in their practices and daily lives.

Flexibility:

These movements are often diverse and flexible, creating their own “rules of life” that are adaptable to a secular framework.

Spiritual practice over dogma:

The focus is on the practice of prayer, meditation, and contemplation, rather than on religious doctrine or supernatural beliefs.

With a couple of my own edits, this pretty much sums it up.

The Secular Modern Monastic isn’t an entirely new creation as there have always been individuals outside of traditional monasticism who have felt called to a more gentle, contemplative way of life. The Desert Mothers and Fathers, and the Beguines are two such examples of contemplative people forging their own path – the former in solitude away from society, the latter a community of individuals living their monastic calling in the midst of their everyday lives – connected through their common call.

Monastics have always been with us, and their purpose has always been the same. While sometimes emerging out of a specific religious tradition, their true purpose transcends belief or doctrine. Instead, they – WE are here to show humanity another way. We are here to show humanity a way out of the imprisonment of the human condition – one that is most often ruled by fear and producing non-loving behaviors that arise out of that fear. Fear is ultimately what compels humans to be gluttonous, selfish, greedy, envious, slothful, vengeful, and vain. Out of their spiritual practice and journey of self-discovery and improvement, secular monastics have learned to transform their fear, coming more and more fully to understand their original nature as Love. Love then, rather than fear, becomes the guiding force of their life which allows them to escape the mechanisms of fear used by the overriding culture.

Modern secular monastics defy the status quo. We are immune to the ministrations of the ruling system of power and control. Not only do we not fit into the system, it is nearly impossible for us to dwell within it. It is for this reason that many find themselves outside the system.

In those newly discovering their monastic calling, the question of community will often surface. As one client has frequently asked, “where do we go?” The answer is simple – we go within. In my experience, there are no formal communities that can hold the secular modern monastic. Instead, we are invited to let community redefine itself. For me, the answer to the question of community is simple: Community has found me. This community is made up of a random and unrelated group of individuals who have all gathered around a specific intention – to be a force of Love in the world. I count among this community my biological family, friends, former and existing clients and students. Some live near me, but the vast majority are scattered around the world doing their own thing and shining their own light. What is common among them is that they are somehow connected to me (I know, weird).

Ultimately, there is no one specific form of secular modern monasticism. When we allow it, it takes on the exact form that we need – a form that we may never have expected.

“Monastic” is a Temperament

October 12, 2025 / Lauri Ann Lumby / 1 Comment

As I allow myself to ease more deeply into the monastic life that has presented itself to me, I am increasingly convinced that “monastic” isn’t made. Neither is it chosen. Instead, it seems, like the Enneagram that suggests we are born our Type (perfectionist, helper, performer, etc.), if we are meant to be monastic, we are born that way. From this perspective, we could say that monastic is a temperament (the more accurate term used in the Enneagram system to describe our type).

I am fortunate to find myself surrounded by those of monastic temperament. Whether it be family, friends, or acquaintances, I have come to identify common traits and preferences that seem to be present among those likely born of monastic temperament who over time have come to choose a monastic lifestyle. The traits that I have been able to identify include (but are not limited to) the following:

A tendency toward introversion.
Preferring solitude to crowds.
Comfortable (even thriving) in silence.
Choosing one-on-one interactions over group interactions.
Become easily overwhelmed in crowds.
Feel vulnerable in the presence of loud sounds, bright lights, frantic movement, high-stress or high-activity environments.
Sensitive to other people’s feelings, may even feel them as their own.
Sensitive to the plight of humanity.
Challenged by a capitalistic culture that places value on and promises to reward people for activity, achievement, etc.
Tend not to be competitive.
Prefer athletic interests that are solo or singular over team sports.
Interested in personal growth and development.
Focused on healing the wounds of their past so they can feel better about themselves and better serve the world.
Feel a deep call to service.
Quiet. Introspective.
Often invisible (or feel invisible) to the world.
Feel as if they don’t fit in to “regular” society.
If in society, they often feel a deep need to escape.
Whether by choice or circumstance, finding themselves living simply.
Not motivated by money, status, or power.
Struggle with imposter syndrome.
May suffer from chronic illness including perceived mental health issues. (are they illnesses or mental health issues or simply the consequences of living in a world not made for us?)
Find enjoyment in simple activities such as reading, meditating, listening to music, cooking, gardening, being in nature.

By no means is this list exhaustive, but these are some of the common traits I have seen in those finding themselves living a monastic life. As much as we are unable to choose our temperament, it seems also that living a monastic life is not a choice. In the way I have experienced it and observed this in others, it seems that if we are called to be monastic, life will take us there no matter what. For the vast majority of those I know currently living monastically, (including myself) they arrived here kicking and screaming. This is the force of a culture that demands we be productive members of society and defines productivity by how hard we work and how much our work supports the gross national product (the wealth of the elite). The monastic temperament defies that culture for our purpose here is not to be part of the status quo, but to show humanity another way.

Support for the Monastic Temperament:

Hell Isn’t All Bad

September 22, 2025 / Lauri Ann Lumby / Leave a comment

Letters from Hell #4

Living in hell isn’t all bad. Hell definitely has its perks:

Living in hell allows us to clearly see the world humanity has created for itself – one that springs forth out of fear and which seeks after power and control in the hopes of mitigating that fear.
Living in hell shows us daily the consequences of this quest for power – greed, gluttony, and the violence that humanity wields in their never-ending quest for MORE.
Hell has been increasingly peeling back the layers of humanity’s corruption and all the lies that have been cultivated to justify injustice.
Hell allows us to see who people truly are, including the lies they continue to tell themselves so they might benefit from the system hell created.
Hell also shows us who we are not.
Every second of every day, hell shows us the system that allows for its survival, along with how to escape that system – if only we would pay attention.

The doorway into hell is the same path by which we can escape. Humanity, as a collective, is not doomed to an eternity in hell. As individuals, we are not condemned to waiting for everyone else to wake up before we can make our own escape. The steps necessary for our escape are simple:

We willing to see the hell-system for what it is – a system that is based on and manipulates us through fear.
Harness the skills of observation required to identify all the seemingly infinite ways in which the system is attempting to manipulate you through fear (or shame).
When you notice the system attempting to trigger your fear/shame – SAY NO!
Instead of giving into the fear, STOP and turn your gaze inward – what is the fear that is being triggered? Where did you first experience this fear/shame?
Engage in the mindfulness/meditation practices that you have for releasing/healing/transforming that fear.
Wash, rinse, repeat.

As the journey into hell was created by a thousand steps, so too is the journey out. Escaping hell is all about identifying every wound, trauma, fear, and past conditioning that ties us to the system, and then unraveling ourselves from them. The journey out of hell is about healing through heightened awareness, and radical personal accountability. The more we see the ways in which the system controls us, the more power we have for making our escape.

Whereas the cacophony of the system wants us to believe otherwise, hell is not what the majority of humanity wants. At our core, most of us yearn for peace. We long for connection. We ache for compassion and kindness. And we’re driven toward justice. To escape hell, we cannot allow the system to convince us otherwise – for humanity is made of Love and it will ultimately be to Love that we will return.

For Support Along the Journey:

The Choosing

August 16, 2025 / Lauri Ann Lumby / 2 Comments

“Decide today who you will serve.”

The words above are from the Book of Joshua in the Hebrew scriptures and perfectly describe where we find ourselves at this point in our human evolution as we are being given an opportunity to choose:

Who or what do you serve?
Who or what do you follow?
Who or what do you worship?
Who or what do you seek to obtain or acquire?
Who or what do you believe in?
Where do you put your time, energy or attention?
What or who do you give your energy to?
How are you using this one precious life you’ve been given?

To me, there is only one appropriate response to these questions, the answer being Love (that which some might call God). When we choose to serve the cause of Love, when we follow Love to its source, when we hold Love above all else, when we seek to know Love more fully, when we believe in the power of Love, when we focus our time, energy, and attention on knowing and being Love, when we give ourselves over to being Love, and if Love is the goal and intention of our lives, then we find ourselves authentically free – meaning peaceful, joyful, and content.

When we choose anything other than Love, we are doomed to be imprisoned by our fears, our conditioning, and our limiting beliefs. Then, we become vulnerable to the manipulations of those who seek to benefit from our fears.

The world in which we are currently living is ruled by those who seek to benefit from our fears: Corporations. Politicians. Governments. Religious authorities. The Media. Conspiracy Theorists. Propaganda creators. – just to name a few. The world is rife with those who understand that fear is an easier choice than Love and who use those fears to control us by getting us to do what they want us to do for their benefit and our detriment. The wholesale destruction of Gaza, for example, is the result of a nation capitalizing on the fear they have created and the individuals around the world who financially benefit from a nation always at war. An example closer to home are the snake-oil salespeople who are happy to take advantage of those suffering with a tragic, difficult, or terminal diagnosis by making false promises of a cure.

What the world doesn’t know is that choosing fear is easier only because it’s all we’ve been conditioned to do. From the time we are conceived, fear is the primary message and tool of control. It doesn’t, however, have to be this way. Neither are we doomed to remain in fear. Breaking away from fear begins with a choice – a choice that we are invited to make every single moment of every single day. This choice begins with a simple question:

In this experience, am I choosing fear or Love?

Let me provide some simple examples:

When you are watching TV and an ad comes on for the latest “weight loss cure,” will you allow the ad to trigger your body judgement and be tempted, or even decide to purchase that product or will you see the ad for what it is – a corporation trying to make you feel bad about yourself so you will buy their product – so you can then decide to choose self-Love over fear?

When crazy sh*t is happening at the White House, do you get sucked into anxiety, fear, and the temptation to enter the spiral of doom, or do you take a breath, see it for what it is (something purposefully trying to trigger your fear), and then let it go with Love?

When a political party (or individual) uses the media to try to set apart a specific ethnic group as “the enemy,” do you buy into the fear or do you understand that in Love, there are no enemies – only those seeking to benefit from a world divided.

Choosing Love requires intention, dedication, discipline, and persistence. Choosing Love takes practice – and is a practice. Choosing Love is at once a choice and an unchoosing as we retrain ourselves from the fear we’ve been conditioned to choose to the Love that is our truest and most original nature. Only in choosing Love will we ever know peace and it is only in more choosing Love over fear that the world will ever know peace.

What are you choosing?

Choosing Love is a practice. All of the resources I provide support you in learning how to choose Love and how to unchoose fear.

Learn more here.