By all accounts, it sure seems like it.

One of my primary gifts is that of observation. Within that gift is the distinct ability to identify patterns and through those patterns, to make an educated guess about what is unfolding. One recent pattern that has been standing out in my life, and in the lives of many with whom I am connected, is that of doors closing. For me, this has been a pattern that has been gracefully (except for my own resistance to change and my desire for security) unfolding over the past several years. 2020 was a major turning point. Beginning with absolutely thriving in shutdown which then supported a desire/drive to turn more inward in both my personal and professional lives.  

This inward trend has not only continued, but it has deepen. No longer do I feel the pressure to “put myself out there,” or to beat my head against the marketing wall trying to drum up business for my classes and services. Instead, I wait until some inner guidance tells me to make a post. Until that happens, I spend much of my time in stillness, tending to the needs of the universe while awaiting further instructions.

I know I am not alone in this as I watch so many friends and colleagues resting in the void, awaiting the arrival of their next mission. As one writer recently stated, “the first task of the first-wavers is coming to an end.” To this I can attest as my final in-person Reiki client informed me this week that she would be taking a break.

I too have felt myself needing a bit of a break from one-on-one work. Not because I don’t love it, but because, quite simply, my energies are being called elsewhere.

This is where things get weird. Other than my part-time paid administrative gig, the work I am increasingly finding myself doing in the world is unable to be monetized. To whom would I send a bill, and what would be an appropriate hourly rate for being called to sit in prayer and extend healing to a community currently under siege, or to a friend facing a diagnosis?

The work I’m being called to is happening far beyond the tangible, material world. There is literally no way to charge for that, and yet, the financial support keeps coming – seemingly out of nowhere. It’s definitely NOT because I’m manifesting it by thinking the right thoughts. On most days, I’m terrified so that rules out the “Law of Attraction.” Is it then the universe’s reciprocal response to loving actions? I may never know. I just know I’m grateful and doing my best to stay in Love, open to Love, and obedient to its guidance, while resisting the temptation to fall into “magical thinking.”

I don’t understand the workings of the Universe. But what I think I understand are the patterns that show us where we are no longer called, the void that accompanies closing doors and the anxiety that is triggered in the unknown, and finally, the surety of something new entering in when we have finally (with our cold dead fingers) let go of that which no longer serves, and being willing to embracing it when it arrives.

Where are you finding yourself in the unfolding of your changing mission?