What if Jesus had Lived to 60?

At sixty-one years old, I find myself contemplating the spirituality of aging and how, perhaps, our calling and mission might change as we move beyond the enthusiasm and excitement of our twenties and thirties and into an entirely different experience that we are just beginning to realize. Contemplating the changing nature of my own call, it hit me, Jesus died at thirty-three!  What would his life have looked like if he had lived past that excitable age? For those of us who have lived through those fruitful years, we remember the passion and excitement that fueled our discovery, our hunger for learning, and the feeling of being compelled to share what we knew, along with the transformative power of what we had only begun to explore.

To put it bluntly, in our thirties, we believed we knew everything that it was our job to inform everyone else. Ah….the innocence of youth.

At sixty-one, we know better (at least I hope we do). The truth we begin to realize as life whittles away at our “confidence” (ie: pride) is that we truly know nothing. Whereas formerly we were certain we knew the nature of God, we understood God’s Truth, we believed in “His” loving care and protection. As life has its way with us, we come to realize we know nothing about God, his plan (if there is one), or his truth. We also learn first-hand that maybe God doesn’t really have our back, and we cannot trust in his protection.

Have I grown cynical in my old age? Perhaps, but let’s look at Jesus for a minute. If we have called Jesus our teacher, read the story of his life, and attempted to understand and apply his teachings, we see that in the life of “God’s own son” there was no protection. God couldn’t even get his own son off the cross, so what possibly could “He” do to save us from the struggles of our own lives? Instead, God’s most beloved (as we were taught) was ridiculed, condemned, and murdered. Jesus failed in his mission and God did nothing to save him or ensure his success. (The “salvation” brought about by the resurrection notwithstanding.)

Jesus was plucked from his life right in the middle of the age of enthusiasm. Of course he was eager and excited to share what he had come to know (thought he had come to know) about God. He then went forth with the sense of mission and purpose consistent with his chronological age.

What would have happened if instead of being killed in the crucifixion, Jesus had somehow lived? Would he be doing in his sixties what he had been doing at thirty-three? I kinda doubt it. The enthusiasm and passion of youth are simply not sustainable into old age. Would Jesus (as God’s son) been granted some sort of dispensation from the natural quieting of age? Perhaps – but just for a minute, let’s pretend that Jesus was 100% human (along with being 100% Divine). Human nature is human nature and if Jesus was meant to live humanness in its entirety, and lived into old age, I truly believe his mission would have changed. It had to have.

For the sake of pondering, let’s just pretend Jesus survived being betrayed by his closest friends and companions and then condemned by his community as a heretic. Would he have stuck around, continuing his efforts of “sharing the good news” publicly? I think perhaps not. There would have been a natural attrition due to the scandal that accompanied him. The hundreds that once followed him would have returned to their regular lives and their devout membership that guaranteed their acceptance in the institution. The disciples, after betraying and abandoning Jesus would have retreated into their shame and returned to their former lives. Those who remained would have been the ones who truly believed and who had remained with Jesus up until the “end.” Even if after being banished by the Church Jesus continued to preach, and teach, and heal, it would have likely been on a much smaller scale.  “Not shouting or crying out or raising his voice in the street. (Isaiah 42).”  Eventually, he would have realized that his awakening (the discovery of that which brought him into the experience of Union with God in peace) was for him alone and that each and every human would eventually discover this on their own and in their own way. Further, he may have come to see that no one needed saving and that God was and would always be in charge. As an aged man, Jesus may have set aside the effort of attempting to save people that don’t need saving and the natural exhaustion that comes from that effort, and retreated into a quiet contemplative life where he could simply be – while perhaps taking up, again, the practice of carpentry that first showed him the peace present in mindful activities.

Of course we will never know what would have happened if Jesus had lived into old age, but this is one of the ideas I ponder as facing the reality of my own so-called calling.  I’ve lived the enthusiastic part. I’ve spent time teaching, guiding, and supporting people’s healing. I’ve been awakened out of my own innocence to the realities of life and its suffering and have learned first-hand that God’s provision and protection are not what I once thought or had been taught.

This doesn’t mean I don’t still look to “God” for help (Psalm 54). Instead of looking outside of myself, I look within. As life and its hardships are swirling around me, God is there in the silence.  God is there in the peace that arises when we move past the chaos, tragedies, and distractions of life. God is where God has always been – in stillness. “Be still and know that I am God. (Psalm 46).”

And today, I am the words of Rhea Rainwater that sustain me:

“A tired heart leaning into silence.”

Universal (Personal) Jesus

As we are approaching Easter, thoughts of Jesus are running through my head. Who was Jesus? Who IS Jesus? Was Jesus real? Was he made up? Is he “Savior?” and if so, for whom? These are the questions that get batted around in theological circles. People have gone to war over these questions. People have been killed for answering these questions “incorrectly.” And yet, after 2000+ years, there is no conclusive answer to these questions – except those which men have created into dogma. But who’s to say any of that is even true?

To me, none of this matters. Whether Jesus was or wasn’t, lived or died, was crucified died and rose again, or is planning to return has zero impact on my faith. Why? Because faith transcends belief while defying logic.

As I am equally romantic and pragmatic, I can allow all answers to be true. I can also allow for them to be false. Because, at the end of the day, we have very little verifiable, scientific evidence to prove any of it. Instead, all we really have is faith. Not what others have told us to believe. Instead, what do we personally believe about Jesus? What have/has been our own personal experiences of Jesus (if any)?

For me, the answer to this question begins with scripture – both canonical and non-canonical. Whereas scripture has been traditionally contained within the doctrinal jurisdiction of religion, my experience is that scripture transcends religion. As an historical work, containing the pseudo-history of a people, scripture provides a narrative within a specific context. Scripture is worthy of study simply for this purpose. Understanding who wrote the different books of the bible, when they were written, their audience, the genre utilized, and the purpose of the author’s writings gives us insight into the tribal, theological, and religious/liturgical evolution of a people. Approached through a pseudo-scientific lens, scripture provides much insight into the Hebrew people who later named themselves Israelites, and into the experiences of the people within that tribe who later called Jesus their teacher and how his presence altered the trajectory of their lives. All of this is worthy of studying.

If we want to know who Jesus is for us personally, however, we have to move beyond the simple reading of scripture. Neither, can we know Jesus simply by what someone else has told us, regardless of who that someone might be. For me, this personal Jesus came through dedicated attention to the methods of prayer, contemplation, and discernment favored by St. Ignatius of Loyola. These approaches to prayer allow for direct communication between Source (God) and ourselves. Through this prayer, what I have uncovered (as have many others before me) is the possibility of a Universal Jesus – one who speaks Truth to all people regardless of their religion, or personal beliefs.

To say otherwise, is proclaiming oneself as higher than God. Who are we to declare that God has ONE chosen people or to suggest there is but one path to being saved? Salvation, I have learned, is simply a matter of perspective – have we found a way to equanimity in the midst of the human condition or have we damned ourselves to suffering?

Beyond anything else, Jesus teaches us how to find peace, contentment, and even joy in the midst of the challenges and difficulties of being human. Whether heaven is here on earth, or on some other plane, is up to us to decide. Jesus shows us how to choose the former. Even if we hope for paradise on the other side of this life, Jesus’ deepest message is how to find paradise here. You will not find these teachings in any church’s doctrine. They can only be found within.

To me, the Universal Jesus is one that came to understand the message of LOVE at the heart of the Judaism in which he was raised. He came to understand the highest Truth taught – that all of creation is an expression of this Love/God and that we are all ONE with this Love. Jesus learned how to remember and embody this Love. He then sought to teach others how to do the same:

His message is truly this simple. YOU ARE LOVE. Remembering this Truth helps us to find peace.  Right here.  Right now.  (And maybe even more completely when we fully return to Source after we have finished this life).

Will the Real Magdalene Please Stand Up?

In the forty years (or so) that I have been working with Mary Magdalene I have come across at least a million different theories about who she was/is, what her life looked like, where she lived, who she slept with and who her children might be. In the twenty years (or so) that I have been actively studying and researching the Magdalene, I have read at least a hundred books specifically dedicated to her which also bears their own theories of the Magdalene.  Some call her an Ascended Master, others an Essene High Priestess, others a prostitute, others an adulterous woman, others the Sang Grael and the mother of a dynasty of European kings and queens (Jesus’ own progeny), and some claim her as a goddess.  Most of these books are based entirely on theory, oral legend or claim to have been “directly channeled” from the Magdalene herself.

Scholars who study the Magdalene refrain from making such claims and instead stick to what they are able to glean from archeological evidence, scripture itself, and ancient re-discovered manuscripts.  My personal preference is to lean toward a more scholarly approach while avoiding the temptation to either define the Magdalene or condemn another’s theory.  It is for this reason that I call my book Song of the Beloved – the Gospel According to Mary Magdalene fiction.  At the end of the day, unless we were there, we know nothing certain about the Magdalene, and until we have passed from this plane, we will never know.

All that being said, I cannot discount the direct, personal experiences and revelations I have had of the Magdalene (and Jesus) through my meditation and prayer.  These revelations have guided and informed my work – my writing and publishing, but most importantly, these revelations guided and informed the human development courses that I have developed and which now make up the Magdalene Priest/ess Training.  This work is rooted in scripture (canonical as well as non-canonical) and embraces the rich tradition of Christian contemplative meditation and prayer practices as its foundation. This work is further supported by modern theories of human development as they have been expressed through Humanist and Transpersonal Psychology. 

Through the integration of scholarly research and personal revelation, what I have come to understand about the Magdalene and the view I present to the world is that:

  • She was not the adulterous woman of scripture.
  • The “healed of seven demons” said of her is likely referring to a formal process of initiation that supported her journey of self-actualization which she underwent with Jesus’ guidance, successfully completed, and then went on to teach others.
  • She is the only one is scripture said to have completed such a process.
  • She stood beside Jesus (unlike his other disciples who hid in the Upper Room) through his trial, crucifixion, death and burial.
  • She was the one to whom the Resurrected Christ was revealed and THE ONE commissioned to bring the news to the other disciples.
  • She continued to have direct, personal and private visitations by Christ through which he imparted upon her his secret teachings. When she tried to share these teachings with the other disciples they ridiculed and condemned her.

All of these “theories” of the Magdalene are taken directly from scripture and affirmed through scholarship (See resources below).

Beyond this, I personally like to believe that Jesus and Mary were husband and wife and that they were equal, co-ministers in sharing the law of love.  I also like to believe that Mary is the only one to have received the full understanding and knowledge of what Jesus came to teach and that she was chosen by Jesus to continue his work.  Legend tells us that she went forth from Palestine and ventured to Alexandria, Egypt, the South of France and perhaps even Glastonbury, England in her journey of sharing the message of love.  None of this can be verified, but it resonates as truth to me.

And you, O tower of the flock,
hill of daughter Zion,
to you it shall come,
the former dominion shall come,
the sovereignty of daughter Jerusalem.

Now why do you cry aloud?
Is there no king in you?
Has your counselor perished,

that pangs have seized you like a woman in labor?
Writhe and groan,O daughter Zion,
like a woman in labor;
for now you shall go forth from the city
and camp in the open country;
you shall go to Babylon.

There you shall be rescued,
there the Lord will redeem you
from the hands of your enemies.

Now many nations
are assembled against you,
saying, “Let her be profaned,
and let our eyes gaze upon Zion.”
But they do not know
the thoughts of the Lord;
they do not understand his plan,
that he has gathered them as sheaves to the threshing floor.
Arise and thresh,
O daughter Zion,
for I will make your horn iron
and your hoofs bronze;
you shall beat in pieces many peoples,
 and shalldevote their gain to the Lord,
 their wealth to the Lord of the whole earth.

Micah 4: 8-13

Select Resources

Bourgeault, Cynthia, The Meaning of Mary Magdalene – Discovering the Woman at the Heart of Christianity, Shambhala Publications, 2010.

Haskins, Susan, Mary Magdalene – Myth and Metaphor, Harcourt Brace & Company, 1993.

King, Karen, L., The Gospel of Mary of Magdala – Jesus and the First Woman Apostle, Polebridge Press, 2003.

Leloup, Jean-Yves, Judas and Jesus – Two Faces of a Single Revelation, Inner Traditions, 2006.

Leloup, Jean-Yves, The Gospel of Mary Magdalene, Inner Traditions, 2002.

Leloup, Jean-Yves, The Gospel of Philip, Inner Traditions, 2003.

Leloup, Jean-Yves, The Gospel of Thomas, Inner Traditions, 2005.

Leloup, Jean-Yves, The Sacred Embrace of Jesus and Mary – The Sexual Mystery at the Heart of the Christian Tradition, Inner Traditions, 2005.

MacDermot, Violet, The Fall of Sophia – A Gnostic Text on the Redemption of Universal Consciousness, Lindisfarne Books, 2001.

Malachi, Tau, The Gnostic Gospel of St. Thomas – Meditations on the Mystical Teachings, Llewellyn Worldwide, 2004.

Malachi, Tau, Gnosis of the Cosmic Christ – a Gnostic Christian Kabbalah, Llewellyn Worldwide, 2005.

Malachi, Tau, Living Gnosis – A Practical Guide to Gnostic Christianity, Llewellyn Worldwide, 2005.

Malachi, Tau, St. Mary Magdalene – The Gnostic Tradition of the Holy Bride, Llewellyn Worldwide, 2006.


Christians Giving God a Bad Name

Ugh!  Where do I even begin? I guess the best place is what is right in front of our noses as we seem to be living through some sort of apocalyptic fever dream created by a certain kind of so-called Christian. This apocalyptic fever dream is predicated on the defense of perceived white, straight- male privilege, fortified by the narcissistic belief of having been chosen by God, and enforced through illegal capture and incarceration. In this fever dream, there are those chosen by God and those who are the enemy. Those chosen are male of white, straight, European descent who claim to be Christian (and their complicit women). The enemy is everyone else.

These so-called chosen ones claim a white, male God who loves them and hates everyone else. They believe in a time of God’s choosing where they will be ushered into heaven while the remaining are cast into hell. They believe it is their duty to first impose and then enforce “God’s law” (as they understand it).  Any and every means of enforcement is allowed and even celebrated. They consider themselves to be soldiers for God and many have the arsenal to show for it. Their God is the only god, and all other expressions of God are wrong. They celebrate power and wealth and worship the prosperity gospel – believing wealth is their divine right and that if they don’t have it, “the enemy” is at fault. It is therefore their right to destroy the enemy because the enemy is keeping them from what God wills for them. It is their duty to hate those who God hates.

These people call themselves Christian. They claim to know Christ, but I’m quite certain they do not. They may know some version of Christ that they learned from their parents or pastors, but I’m fairly certain if the Love that is Christ showed up in the form of Jesus – a dark-skinned Palestinian man – they would seek to crucify him. (interesting how history unhealed repeats itself).

The very human part of me becomes enraged when I hear people who call themselves Christian preaching racism, homophobia, xenophobia, and sexism. I want to go into battle when I hear Christians justifying evil as “God’s-will.” I want to throw bibles at those who believe it is their divine mission to ignore the needs of the poor and eradicate the programs that provide for their basic needs. I want to throw stones at those who believe food, clothing, shelter, education, and healthcare are solely the right of the privileged and not rights for all. I want to tar and feather them with the words of Jesus (and the Universal Declaration of Human Rights) that say otherwise.

I want to but I won’t. While I feel insane hearing these people speak of their God and their divine rights, the compassionate part of me also understands what I can only imagine as deep, impenetrable wounds that would cause one to see right past the Love that is God and was modeled and taught by Jesus (and a whole slew of other great humans), and into the eyes of hate.

I don’t understand it. But, I wasn’t raised in a home or by a religion that taught me to hate. Sometimes, delivered by imperfect humans (we’re all imperfect), the messages caused confusion, and at times the messages were conflicting, but at the end of the day, I saw past the human imperfection to the Love that was either right in front of my eyes, or hiding beneath the surface. While divine punishment and threats of hell may have been uttered, Love always won out. I heard the Love louder than the fear and it is that which guided me to the “God” that I know today.

My “God” isn’t the old man in the sky (even though that image still persists). To me, God is Love (1 John 4:7). As Love, I can no longer imagine a hell or a devil whose job is to drag us there. God, to me, is not defined by form, but is omnipresent – PRESENT IN ALL THINGS. God is imminent and immanent. God is in us (Luke 17: 20-21) and all around us. God is everything and is Ain-Sof (the no-thing). God is the Source from which all things come forth and to which all things return. This Source is LOVE.

This is the “God” that I have come to know in being raised Catholic, thirty years of dedicated study of scripture including modern-day scripture scholars, and over sixty years of personal meditation, contemplation and prayer over the life of Jesus and his teachings. This Love/God is what has guided me on my path, initiated corrections when I veered from that path, and led me to the deep well of inner peace and contentment that can only come as one comes to know that Love.

When Christians give God a bad name, I think of this.  I think of the God that I have come to know and the hate that is impossible in the face of this Love. I find myself sad for those who think they know God when all they truly know is hate. I wish and pray that one day Love will break them open and show them the peace, joy, and wonder that this Love brings, and how in the face of this Love all fear and separation falls away. I wish for them to realize the Love they are in this Love, and the Love that is in all things. I pray for them to understand that they, and all of creation are expressions of God’s Love. I want for them to have the change of heart that this understanding brings. This change of heart will then empower them to lay down their swords and replace them with Love. Love will then compel them on the path of goodness that knows we are here, not to serve our fear-driven desires, but to be and do the work of Love in the world – healing the sick, caring for the poor, feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, providing shelter for the homeless, and setting captives free, as Jesus called us to do. In doing this, they will be proof of the time-honored hymn: “They will know we are Christians by our Love.

Don’t Miss Our Archives

Again, welcome to new subscribers. As a new arrival to this community, I wanted to give you the opportunity to get caught up on some topics that might be important to you! Click on the links below for topical articles and lessons.

Mary Magdalene

Modern Monasticism

Jesus in the Modern World

Scripture through an Informed Lens

Mindfulness

Self-Actualization

Raised Catholic

Thank you for allowing yourself to receive the nourishment and support through these “musings.” I appreciate your presence here and your contribution to the ongoing unfolding of human evolution!

With love,

Lauri

Appropriating the Magdalene

a warning written in blood?

This morning, another Magdalene appropriator was brought to my attention. Knowing this person and their long history of taking credit for other people’s work, or outright stealing their work for their own uses, I first became afraid, then enraged. How dare this person (who I know)…

I tried.  I really tried to write something – appropriate? Scathing? Eeking of black magic? But I found I just couldn’t.

I just couldn’t because, it’s already been done!

These are my very own words!  (Read full blog here).

The Magdalene doesn’t need my defending. Neither does the work I do on her behalf and in her name.

As a dear friend reminded me, “I wouldn’t be too worried about it. Those drawn to her (said appropriator) are not on the same frequency as you are.  You don’t want that low vibration. It’ll make you sick.” Right on that.

As one of my current training participants celebrated:

Meaning – it’s the real deal!  Rooted in scholarship. Anchored in contemplative prayer. Centered in scripture. Facilitating human development resulting in self-actualization.

No whoo. No one blowing smoke up someone’s ass telling them what they want to hear.  No one taking advantage of other people’s insecurities or vulnerabilities to make themselves rich. NO SHINY OBJECTS!

No wonder I couldn’t write what I originally intended. It’s not what the Magdalene would have done. Instead, it seems she intervened by staying my blood-dipped pen, forcing me to remember that I am not the one doing the work – She is!  And…


Back Where I Belong

As I write this at 9:46am on Saturday, October 28th, I just finished listening to my favorite online astrologer, Lori Lothian, deliver her “Saturn direct” reading for November. As it turns out, I was born with Saturn in Pisces – exactly where Saturn finds himself now. Repeating these cycles every 29 years or so, I am in the midst of my second Saturn return. I share this because it is relevant to where I find myself at this exact moment in my spiritual/vocational journey.

In 1993 when I experienced my first Saturn return, I had the “brick to the head” experience that launched me into seven years of ministry training and the discovery, activation, and deepening of my calling. All this was done with and in the Catholic Church.

In 2003 I left formal church ministry and took my work into the secular world. Since 2003 that work has evolved, unfolded, and taken on many external forms. My heart and my soul were rooted in the Jesus I had come to know and the Mary Magdalene that was his closest companion and the one who most fully understood his teachings and who was then sent forth to continue the mission of Love after Jesus’ death. Now I found myself, however, having to “sell” my work to a secular audience who might most accurately be called “spiritual but not religious.” The ways I attempted to market this work to a diverse audience were many, taking on many different names and forms.  But only on the outside. While the packaging may have changed, the materials inside were the same:

Rooted in scripture. Grounded in contemplative practice. Defined by scholarship.

In the last several years, I have found all that I had attempted falling away. Piece by piece by broken piece, everything I had worked for in the past 30 years has died.

Or so it seemed.

I surrendered to the dying. I grieved the loss. I have spent more time in the VOID than anyone should have to spend. Empty. Nothing left to pursue. Nothing new to create. No visible paths. Nothing but the blackest of blackness where nothing remains but from which all of creation emerges.

Then last week something shifted. For the first time in 30 years I saw the whole truth of something that had been blocking my access to my full power. I saw it. I unhooked myself from it. I bore witness to the kickback (there’s always a kickback when we deprive something of the power we’d been giving it). I sat in the fullness of the liberation.

Then the floodgates opened and carried me right back to where I began (sort of). What came forth out of that return is a complete overhaul/return to the origin of my work along with a recognition – not of what I formerly wanted – but rather, what already is.

The Order of the Magdalene is already fully formed. The community has already been gathering. The formation was already whole in its original form. Why not own it and quit:

  • Asking permission.
  • Trying to meet everybody’s needs.
  • Trying to appeal to everyone.
  • Using other people’s language.
  • Competing with shiny objects.
  • Trying to be shiny.
  • Comparing myself with others.
  • Questioning and doubting.

This is who I am and what I do. Period.  Doing the work of Love as was exampled by Jesus and Mary Magdalene. Honoring the tradition from which I came. Recognizing the wisdom of scripture (canonical and non-canonical). Celebrating my own monastic calling. Embracing the gifts of contemplation. Remaining rooted in scholarship.

In short – keeping it real.

If you’re one who likes to keep it real – please check out The Order of the Magdalene 2023 Reboot.  Back to where I belong.

And thank you for all those who have been with me throughout this crazy journey. I am grateful for you!

With love,

Lauri

Featured Course: Victory of the Holy Bride

What is your current understanding of the Book of Revelation?

Doomsday Prophecy?

Historical Reflection?

Heavenly Vision?

Big Fat Mystery?

To learn more and enroll click on the image above.

Come and explore this mysterious and often confusing book of the Bible from a different perspective while reclaiming the role of the Divine Feminine as the true heroine of this epic mythological tale. 

Victory of the Holy Bride shatters over 2000 years of patriarchal dogma that cast the Book of Revelation in the role of doomsday prophecy and presents to you the tools for discovering a profoundly simple truth that is the key to inner peace and the formula through which we endure the “times of tribulation” while building a whole new world – one rooted in peace, understanding, wisdom, harmony and love. 

Discover the secret of the Book of Revelation and learn how to apply that secret in your everyday life so that you might know peace.

In knowing that peace, you will have the freedom to begin creating a whole new world for yourself.

Course Outline:

Lesson One: Introduction to the Book of Revelation

Lesson Two: The Structure of Revelation

Lesson Three: Alpha and Omega

Lesson Four: The Mystical Seven and its place in Revelation

Lesson Five: The Time of Tribulation

Lesson Six: The Dragon and the Woman

Lesson Seven: The Fall of Babylon/The New Jerusalem

From the course introduction by Lauri Ann Lumby:

Victory of the Holy Bride shatters over 2000 years of patriarchal dogma that cast the Book of Revelation in the role of doomsday prophecy and presents to you the tools for discovering a profoundly simple truth that is the key to inner peace and the formula through which we can build a whole new world – one rooted in peace, understanding, wisdom, harmony and love.

The inspiration for this course came long before its birth in a tiny whispering voice that said, “There is something in the Book of Revelation…..there is something in the Book of Revelation.” This something was somehow connected with the 7 chakras and the trademarked protocol that I created (was given) that I call Authentic Freedom. For years this whispering continued all the way through the development of Authentic Freedom, Deepening Freedom, Living in Freedom and the other examples of the “secret of seven” that is hidden in the depths of the Judeo-Christian tradition and as it is communicated through scripture.

I approached the Book of Revelation many times before it yielded its secrets to me, but once they were revealed my mind was blown! Not because what I was shown was complicated or profound, but because it was so dang simple! Then I wondered, how is it that in 2000 years no one had uncovered the simple truth revealed in the Book of Revelation? Maybe someone had, but nowhere in my Catholic-Christian upbringing (including almost 12 years in Catholic school) or in seven years of ministry training had this simple truth been explained. Instead, the Book of Revelation was either spoken of as doomsday prophecy or ignored all together. It was as if the Church had no use for the Book of Revelation unless as a tool for manipulating others through fear and if there might be something more to it, they would rather not know (or would rather we didn’t know).

But here’s the secret: there is absolutely nothing to fear about the Book of Revelation! Instead, it is a message of profound hope – the simple truth of the human condition, along with the even simpler formula for enjoying the peace and freedom brought forth by this truth.

It really is that simple. But first, we must comb through the layers of symbolic language and metaphor used by its author (attributed to St. John the Divine) to veil this simple truth from those who are not yet ready, and perhaps to protect those who would know this truth from those whose power might be threatened.

For those in patriarchal power, there is much to fear in the simple truth of the Book of Revelation for when we understand and do the work of embodying the truth revealed in this book, we are no longer subject to the fearful manipulations of the outside perceived patriarchal authority. Instead, we discover our own sovereignty and the Divine power within that guides us on the path to our truth and which frees us to live that truth fully. Here we discover a whole new world of peace, contentment, empowerment and joy dwelling within us and which seeks to be known in the world through us.


Testimonials from past students of this course:

I’ve enjoyed Lauri’s course as much as any I can remember. She is insightful and very well informed, but often with an original take on the material. I enjoy that she both understands Christianity, from her years as a Catholic, and Judaism, but also the priestess path. So her work is a hybrid of understandings, both historical and fresh. Her lecture delivery is clear. She has innovative activities and reflections which she invites us to do.

This course especially feels very timely, as is all Lauri’s work. I also really enjoyed interacting live, but the course is engaging on its own – so much so that I stayed up to the small hours (due to the time difference) to be able to participate.

I also love Lauri’s pricing policy, her generosity, and her values. This is a spiritual leader and teacher (though she’d probably be too modest to call herself as such) who is rooted in soul and heart work first before the ‘I’m worth it’ high charging mentality of other spiritual businesses. This is why I’m doing courses with Lauri. I heartily commend her. ER, United Kingdom

Understanding the Book of Revelation

Revelations – the great mystery book of the bible.  For centuries, used as a tool to strike fear in the hearts of humanity.  Touted as a prophecy of things to come if humanity doesn’t get their moral act together, and told as bedtime stories to scare children into good behavior.  If we don’t obey God we will suffer “His” wrath…but wait, even if we are good, kind, loving, and obedient, the end times will still come…..and it is coming soon!  (It’s been coming soon for 2000 years!) With the end time comes war, pestilence, frightening beasts, and terrifying portents in the skies.  But if we can endure the trauma, then we will be rewarded with the coming of the King, and the New Jerusalem will come down from heaven, heralding the reign of peace.  It seems no matter what we do, the apocalypse is coming and only the few and the brave will be rewarded with an eternity in heaven.  The question that hangs in the balance is “Are you one of the 144,000?” 

But here’s the deal, the Book of Revelations has nothing to do with the end times.  It never did.  It has always been about NOW.  Revelations is not a book of prophecies; neither is it a warning of God’s wrath; nor a manual for the end times.  While Tim LaHaye and his buddies made millions on their Left Behind series, Revelations has forever and always been about RIGHT NOW.  Revelations, plain and simple, is an allegory expressing the difference between a life with “God” and a life without.  When we lose track of our connection with the Divine, we suffer torment and unspeakable horrors.  When we remember this connection, we experience heaven on earth.  But here’s the twist – when we suffer it isn’t because God is punishing us.  It is simply the natural consequence of turning away from our true nature which is in Union with God (Love).  When we are One with our true nature (God/Love), we know peace, joy, contentment, and are able to live from compassion and love. 

It really is this simple.  And the formula is even easier:

“I am the Alpha and the Omega, the first and the last,
the beginning and the end.”

This single proclamation of the Divine, repeated over and over and over throughout the Book of Revelation, is the key to it all.  When we make our union with the Divine the center of our life, we know peace.  When we forget this union, we are disturbed.  That’s it!  End of story!

But, maintaining our attention to this union is easier said than done.  We live in a world of distractions.  The human condition is a distraction.  There are (seem to be) a million things vying for our attention.  TV.  Work.  Family.  Friends.  Money, OBLIGATIONS.  Ugh!  Yes, we must provide for ourselves and our families.  Yes, our relationships require our attention.  But really, how much of our time is simply wasted on unnecessary tasks, unfulfilling “obligations,” things that we are simply doing out of habit or because we were told we had to do this by our societal conditioning.  Or maybe we are keeping ourselves busy to avoid the real task at hand which is the invitation to get right with Ourselves. 

Right with Ourselves!  Not right with God.  God loves us for who we are….IN THIS AND EVERY MOMENT!  We are the ones who are not right with ourselves.  Every time we deny the yearning and calling of our Soul.  Every time we ignore our inner pain.  Each time we distract ourselves from our true self and its needs and wants.  When we are not right with ourselves, we suffer anxiety, worry, restlessness, fear, emotional and physical pain.  When we are not one with ourselves, we are not one with God.  Or rather, we have forgotten our Oneness with God…..because in spite of all our efforts to separate ourselves from our Truth, God remains.

“I am the Alpha and the Omega, the first and the last,
the beginning and the end.”

God is all there is.  All there is is God.  And we are part of and an expression of the Divine Source that is within and through us all.  If we are feeling unrest, it is because we forgot this singular truth.  This IS the truth that will set us free – if and when we remember it. 

So this is our task – to remember our Union with the Divine and in remembering this Union, coming home to ourselves.  The “New Jerusalem” isn’t a castle in the clouds, and neither is it happening in some future time in a Heaven light years away. It is NOW.  It is within us.  WHEN we remember this Truth.  So, let’s get to it, shall we?


Suggested Spiritual Practice

This is the hard part.  Remembering our Union with the Divine is an every moment of every day job.  It requires discipline, persistence and PRACTICE.  And we will never, ever, ever, in our human experience perfect this remembering.  All we can do is take it moment by moment, day by day and practice forgiveness of ourselves WHEN we forget.  J  We will forget and we will fail.  But the task is to keep coming back, again and again and again, to this truth:

“I am the Alpha and the Omega, the first and the last,
the beginning and the end.”

In the coming week, I invite you into a practice of observation.  Through this practice, you are invited to observe where you are remembering this truth and feeling that sense of Union with God and your higher self and where you are not.  You will notice oneness vs. separation in the following:

Oneness = peace, contentment, joy.

Separation = anxiety, worry, fear.

I also invite you take note of where your attention is placed.  When is your attention on your Soul and God and when is it elsewhere?  Make note of the difference you feel within yourself when you are connected to Soul/God and when you are not.

Connection = peace, contentment, joy, fulfillment, flow.

Separation = restlessness, boredom, anxiety, worry, fear, frustration, impatience.

Simply take note.  Then, if you feel so-called, begin the work of turning away from those experiences that cause separation and turning instead toward those that support you in feeling Union.


Victory of the Holy Bride shatters over 2000 years of patriarchal dogma that cast the Book of Revelation in the role of doomsday prophecy and presents to you the tools for discovering a profoundly simple truth that is the key to inner peace and the formula through which we endure the “times of tribulation” while building a whole new world – one rooted in peace, understanding, wisdom, harmony and love. 

Will the Real Magdalene Please Stand Up?

In the forty years (or so) that I have been working with Mary Magdalene I have come across at least a million different theories about who she was/is, what her life looked like, where she lived, who she slept with and who her children might be. In the twenty years (or so) that I have been actively studying and researching the Magdalene, I have read at least a hundred books specifically dedicated to her which also bears their own theories of the Magdalene.  Some call her an Ascended Master, others an Essene High Priestess, others a prostitute, others an adulterous woman, others the Sang Grael and the mother of a dynasty of European kings and queens (Jesus’ own progeny), and some claim her as a goddess.  Most of these books are based entirely on theory, oral legend or claim to have been “directly channeled” from the Magdalene herself.

Scholars who study the Magdalene refrain from making such claims and instead stick to what they are able to glean from archeological evidence, scripture itself, and ancient re-discovered manuscripts.  My personal preference is to lean toward a more scholarly approach while avoiding the temptation to either define the Magdalene or condemn another’s theory.  It is for this reason that I call my book Song of the Beloved – the Gospel According to Mary Magdalene fiction.  At the end of the day, unless we were there, we know nothing certain about the Magdalene, and until we have passed from this plane, we will never know.

All that being said, I cannot discount the direct, personal experiences and revelations I have had of the Magdalene (and Jesus) through my meditation and prayer.  These revelations have guided and informed my work – my writing and publishing, but most importantly, these revelations guided and informed the human development courses that I have developed and which now make up the Magdalene Priest/ess Training.  This work is rooted in scripture (canonical as well as non-canonical) and embraces the rich tradition of Christian contemplative meditation and prayer practices as its foundation. This work is further supported by modern theories of human development as they have been expressed through Humanist and Transpersonal Psychology. 

Through the integration of scholarly research and personal revelation, what I have come to understand about the Magdalene and the view I present to the world is that:

  • She was not the adulterous woman of scripture.
  • The “healed of seven demons” said of her is likely referring to a formal process of initiation that supported her journey of self-actualization which she underwent with Jesus’ guidance, successfully completed, and then went on to teach others.
  • She is the only one is scripture said to have completed such a process.
  • She stood beside Jesus (unlike his other disciples who hid in the Upper Room) through his trial, crucifixion, death and burial.
  • She was the one to whom the Resurrected Christ was revealed and THE ONE commissioned to bring the news to the other disciples.
  • She continued to have direct, personal and private visitations by Christ through which he imparted upon her his secret teachings. When she tried to share these teachings with the other disciples they ridiculed and condemned her.

All of these “theories” of the Magdalene are taken directly from scripture and affirmed through scholarship (See resources below).

Beyond this, I personally like to believe that Jesus and Mary were husband and wife and that they were equal, co-ministers in sharing the law of love.  I also like to believe that Mary is the only one to have received the full understanding and knowledge of what Jesus came to teach and that she was chosen by Jesus to continue his work.  Legend tells us that she went forth from Palestine and ventured to Alexandria, Egypt, the South of France and perhaps even Glastonbury, England in her journey of sharing the message of love.  None of this can be verified, but it resonates as truth to me.

While these are the “truths” I embrace regarding the Magdalene, none of these am I attached to, because again, unless we were there, we will never know.  What I have come to understand about the Magdalene is that she reveals herself to us in the ways that are consistent with our temperament, our personalities, our unique lens into the world and in concert with our unique giftedness and calling in this life.  As such, the Magdalene has revealed herself to me through the lens of my Catholic-Christian upbringing and education and through the reasoned lens of scholarship where the scientific method might provide some assurance of truth.  For others, she reveals herself as an Essene High Priestess, a Priestess of Isis, a pseudo-pagan priestess and goddess, to others an Ascended Master and to others still, the Goddess herself. 

As St. Paul once said of himself, Mary Magdalene has become all things for all people for the sake of fulfilling her mission which is to complete the mission that Jesus began of turning our world from one in fear to one ruled by and for the purpose of love.

And you, O tower of the flock,
hill of daughter Zion,
to you it shall come,
the former dominion shall come,
the sovereignty of daughter Jerusalem.

Now why do you cry aloud?
Is there no king in you?
Has your counselor perished,

that pangs have seized you like a woman in labor?
Writhe and groan,O daughter Zion,
like a woman in labor;
for now you shall go forth from the city
and camp in the open country;
you shall go to Babylon.

There you shall be rescued,
there the Lord will redeem you
from the hands of your enemies.

Now many nations
are assembled against you,
saying, “Let her be profaned,
and let our eyes gaze upon Zion.”
But they do not know
the thoughts of the Lord;
they do not understand his plan,
that he has gathered them as sheaves to the threshing floor.
Arise and thresh,
O daughter Zion,
for I will make your horn iron
and your hoofs bronze;
you shall beat in pieces many peoples,
 and shalldevote their gain to the Lord,
 their wealth to the Lord of the whole earth.

Micah 4: 8-13

Select Resources

Bourgeault, Cynthia, The Meaning of Mary Magdalene – Discovering the Woman at the Heart of Christianity, Shambhala Publications, 2010.

Haskins, Susan, Mary Magdalene – Myth and Metaphor, Harcourt Brace & Company, 1993.

King, Karen, L., The Gospel of Mary of Magdala – Jesus and the First Woman Apostle, Polebridge Press, 2003.

Leloup, Jean-Yves, Judas and Jesus – Two Faces of a Single Revelation, Inner Traditions, 2006.

Leloup, Jean-Yves, The Gospel of Mary Magdalene, Inner Traditions, 2002.

Leloup, Jean-Yves, The Gospel of Philip, Inner Traditions, 2003.

Leloup, Jean-Yves, The Gospel of Thomas, Inner Traditions, 2005.

Leloup, Jean-Yves, The Sacred Embrace of Jesus and Mary – The Sexual Mystery at the Heart of the Christian Tradition, Inner Traditions, 2005.

MacDermot, Violet, The Fall of Sophia – A Gnostic Text on the Redemption of Universal Consciousness, Lindisfarne Books, 2001.

Malachi, Tau, The Gnostic Gospel of St. Thomas – Meditations on the Mystical Teachings, Llewellyn Worldwide, 2004.

Malachi, Tau, Gnosis of the Cosmic Christ – a Gnostic Christian Kabbalah, Llewellyn Worldwide, 2005.

Malachi, Tau, Living Gnosis – A Practical Guide to Gnostic Christianity, Llewellyn Worldwide, 2005.

Malachi, Tau, St. Mary Magdalene – The Gnostic Tradition of the Holy Bride, Llewellyn Worldwide, 2006.


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