Magdalene Formation Program

The Order of the Magdalene Formation Program provides you with resources, knowledge, and tools to support you in your own journey of self-discovery and empowerment. Through this eighteen-month training program, you will:

  • Become rooted in scholarly and intuitive knowledge of the Magdalene, her role in the ministry of Jesus, and her example in the ongoing mission of Love.
  • Discern your own unique giftedness and how you are called to use these gifts for the sake of your own fulfillment and in service to the world.
  • Learn practical skills for uncovering and healing all that separates you from Love and from living as your most authentic self.
  • Rediscover ancient knowledge and practices for self-healing.
  • Cultivate and deepen your contemplative life while growing in contentment and compassion.

Created and facilitated by Lauri Ann Lumby

64 weeks of content

7 individual courses

6 private mentoring sessions

This training is unlike any other Magdalene training as it is deeply rooted in canonical and non-canonical scripture, scholarship, contemplative practice, and developmental psychology.

The Order of the Magdalene Formation Program with Lauri Ann Lumby provides the resources, support, and tools through which you will become fully sovereign in your unique giftedness and empowered to live that out for the sake of your own fulfillment and in service to the betterment of the world.

Included Coursework (if you have taken any of these courses, contact Lauri to have your course fee applied):

Resurrecting the Magdalene– 6 weeks

The purpose of this course is to reveal and share in the deeper and hidden truths about the Magdalene and her time with Jesus; including her roles as student, initiate, co-equal partner, wife, facilitator and witness to the resurrection, and the one sent to continue Jesus’ mission of being love in the world.  Participants are empowered through the course to reclaim their own Divine Feminine and are activated to be a vessel of Divine Love in the world.

Uniquely Gifted– 13 weeks

Discover your own unique gifts—the gifts you have been given to experience meaning and purpose in your life and through which you will find fulfillment for yourself and in service to the betterment of the world.

Into the Wilderness* – 10 weeks

Learn the seven core fears that prevent you from being your most magnificent and fulfilled self, along with proven tools for moving through and overcoming those fears.

The Gospel of Mary Magdalene** – 12 weeks

This course provides an in-depth study of the Gospel of Mary Magdalene – a critically important text in the exploration of women’s roles in matters of spirituality and religion, but more importantly as recipients and communicators of the Divine. Course concludes with your own self-facilitated dedication ceremony.

Song of Love**– 9 weeks

Learn and apply the Aramaic Prayer of Jesus as a powerful tool for moving through the fears and inner obstacles for living your truth and fulfilling your life purpose.

Know Thyself – 12 weeks

Exploring the Enneagram as a tool for self-empowerment and as a resource for balancing your fear-based perceptions and behaviors, ultimately harnessing your Soul’s purpose as a reformer,   helper, achiever, muse, sage, strategist, enthusiast, champion or peacemaker.

Back Where I Belong

As I write this at 9:46am on Saturday, October 28th, I just finished listening to my favorite online astrologer, Lori Lothian, deliver her “Saturn direct” reading for November. As it turns out, I was born with Saturn in Pisces – exactly where Saturn finds himself now. Repeating these cycles every 29 years or so, I am in the midst of my second Saturn return. I share this because it is relevant to where I find myself at this exact moment in my spiritual/vocational journey.

In 1993 when I experienced my first Saturn return, I had the “brick to the head” experience that launched me into seven years of ministry training and the discovery, activation, and deepening of my calling. All this was done with and in the Catholic Church.

In 2003 I left formal church ministry and took my work into the secular world. Since 2003 that work has evolved, unfolded, and taken on many external forms. My heart and my soul were rooted in the Jesus I had come to know and the Mary Magdalene that was his closest companion and the one who most fully understood his teachings and who was then sent forth to continue the mission of Love after Jesus’ death. Now I found myself, however, having to “sell” my work to a secular audience who might most accurately be called “spiritual but not religious.” The ways I attempted to market this work to a diverse audience were many, taking on many different names and forms.  But only on the outside. While the packaging may have changed, the materials inside were the same:

Rooted in scripture. Grounded in contemplative practice. Defined by scholarship.

In the last several years, I have found all that I had attempted falling away. Piece by piece by broken piece, everything I had worked for in the past 30 years has died.

Or so it seemed.

I surrendered to the dying. I grieved the loss. I have spent more time in the VOID than anyone should have to spend. Empty. Nothing left to pursue. Nothing new to create. No visible paths. Nothing but the blackest of blackness where nothing remains but from which all of creation emerges.

Then last week something shifted. For the first time in 30 years I saw the whole truth of something that had been blocking my access to my full power. I saw it. I unhooked myself from it. I bore witness to the kickback (there’s always a kickback when we deprive something of the power we’d been giving it). I sat in the fullness of the liberation.

Then the floodgates opened and carried me right back to where I began (sort of). What came forth out of that return is a complete overhaul/return to the origin of my work along with a recognition – not of what I formerly wanted – but rather, what already is.

The Order of the Magdalene is already fully formed. The community has already been gathering. The formation was already whole in its original form. Why not own it and quit:

  • Asking permission.
  • Trying to meet everybody’s needs.
  • Trying to appeal to everyone.
  • Using other people’s language.
  • Competing with shiny objects.
  • Trying to be shiny.
  • Comparing myself with others.
  • Questioning and doubting.

This is who I am and what I do. Period.  Doing the work of Love as was exampled by Jesus and Mary Magdalene. Honoring the tradition from which I came. Recognizing the wisdom of scripture (canonical and non-canonical). Celebrating my own monastic calling. Embracing the gifts of contemplation. Remaining rooted in scholarship.

In short – keeping it real.

If you’re one who likes to keep it real – please check out The Order of the Magdalene 2023 Reboot.  Back to where I belong.

And thank you for all those who have been with me throughout this crazy journey. I am grateful for you!

With love,

Lauri

When There’s Nothing Left To Do

But wait, watch, and pray.

We stand at a precipice. The predictions have been made. The foretelling offered. We prophets have shared what we see and spoken what we’ve heard.

The world as we have known it is coming to an end.

We’ve known this. We’ve warned of it. We’ve offered ways in which we might avoid the violent destruction and collapse of all that we have known. Yet the world has turned a deaf ear and a blind eye.

The world as we have known it is coming to an end.

The hierarchical, patriarchal systems that have defined our way of life for the past many thousands of years are imploding upon themselves. Established on the foundation of fear, power, oppression, manipulation and control, they have proven themselves to be unsustainable. In their attempts to maintain their power, they are taking the world with them. Innocent lives are being lost. Civilizations destroyed. Environments decimated – all for the sake of the selfish and greedy few.

Those who claim the loudest to be the strongest are the greatest offenders. Their fall will be the most painful….but not until “they” have claimed millions of innocent lives.

The world as we have known it is coming to and end.

And there’s not a damn thing we can do about it. We’ve given our warnings. We’ve offered solutions and ways to repair our dying world. And no one has listened.

Instead, the proof of our words are coming to roost. Patriarchal institutions collapsing around us: government, education, healthcare, corporations, banking, stock markets, housing, – everything built on fear, power, oppression, and control – falling down around us.

To the prophets and healers among us:  We’ve done our jobs. We’ve spoken what we’ve heard and shared what we have seen – and for the most part we’ve been ignored. Invisible. Now, there is nothing more for us to do. We cannot stop the runaway train of collapse. Now, there is nothing left to do but wait, watch, and pray (however you understand that term).  

AND take care of ourselves by getting out of the way. The world as we have known it is coming to an end, but we are not called to go down with it. Instead, we will watch, observe, and SURVIVE so that we might be a part of building that something new that has been waiting in the wings for the dying world to be done with its dying.

We are also called to REMEMBER. To remember what got humanity here in the first place so this never, ever, has to happen again.

Copyright Lauri Ann Lumby http://www.lauriannlumby.com

Can We Love Humanity Enough?

The most radical form of love is knowing when to let go. This is the way that we are loved by our creator. Love made us. Then Love let us go so that we could live our own life, pursue our own dreams, make our own mistakes, distance ourselves from Love, only to hopefully and eventually find our way back. But indeed, out of love, our Creator let us go. Not intruding. Not interfering. Not interjecting its own intention or desire for our lives. Instead, our Creator just is. Present. Watching. Listening. Holding us in Love. All while letting us live our lives in our own way.  

This is the meaning of the story of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15: 11-32). The wise father, knowing his son, let him go. The father left his son to his own devices, knowing that his son’s wanderlust would not be quenched by forcing him to stay at home. He let him go to discover the world, apart from the love and protection of his father, where he could learn, and grow, have adventures, and make mistakes. It was through the father’s love that he let his son go. The father did not intrude. He didn’t go out and try to save his son or attempt to protect him from himself. Instead, the father let him be. In letting him be, the father never stopped loving his son. He never stopped waiting, watching, allowing, and hoping the best for his son. But he did let him go. And when the son returned, the father didn’t punish or shame him or taunt him for his mistakes. Instead, the father welcomed his son home with open arms and celebrated his return.

This is the radical kind of love that we are invited to embrace. Indeed, it may be in living this kind of radical love that we can finally be free from all the ways we wish, hope, dream, that humanity will one day work itself out, get its shit together, and learn to live as love. We cannot change those who don’t want to change, and we cannot heal those who don’t want to be healed. All we can do is be present.  Wait. Watch. Listen. And Allow. Humanity is working out its own salvation, in its own way, in its own time. And it is none of our business, except to be the Love that we are and welcome humanity home to that Love when they too are ready to embrace it.

Is Self Awareness the Road to Hell???

This past week I learned of a sermon recently preached by a pastor of a local super-mega church. (I won’t name the church, but if you live in the Fox Valley of Wisconsin you might know of whom I speak.)  This pastor told his audience of thousands that “self-awareness, self-help, and personal development are the road to hell.”

WHAT!?  Not only is this bad theology, it’s scripturally inaccurate!  As it’s not my job to prove to fundamentalists that their beliefs are wrong, and since they won’t be able to hear my arguments anyway, I will speak instead to those who seek a more awakened view of scripture, including Jesus’ teachings.

Knowledge of self and the application of that knowledge is absolutely crucial for accomplishing what Jesus prays for us to do:

“The glory that you have given me
I have given to them,
so that they may be one,
as we are one,
I in them and you in me,
that they may become completely one,
and thus the world may know
that you have sent me
and that you have loved them
even as you have loved me.”

John 17: 22-23

In these words, delivered as part of the Last Supper Discourses, Jesus prays that his disciples (us) might come to know the union/oneness that he came to know in (that which he called) God. He spoke of this oneness as the kingdom of God. In this state of union, which Jesus found within himself through contemplation and prayer (MT 6:6), he found the peace, contentment and joy that define the kingdom that is right here in our midst (Lk 17: 21). It was also in this state where Jesus found guidance and direction and grew in the knowledge of his true nature as One with God as Love (1Jn 4: 7-12).

I could go on and on and on with scripture references that support growing in self-awareness and knowledge, and doing what we can to improve ourselves, but I won’t.  Suffice it to say that scripture (both Hebrew and Christian – canonical and non-canonical) is abundant with invitations to become the best possible versions of ourselves and that to do that we first uncover all those places within ourselves that have forgotten our true nature as Love, and do the deep inner work of healing those areas of woundedness. Yes, there is a Source that assists us with that healing, AND we have to want to be healed.  As Jesus himself said, “Ask and it will be given to you. (Mt 7:7-8)”  

Now, to the fundamentalist preacher’s point, the only person to whom self-knowledge is the road to hell is the one who doesn’t want to know the truth about themselves. For the rest of us, the path of self-knowledge is the path of liberation and salvation. Yes, it’s a challenging path, as it is in the journey of self-awareness that we discover all that is not part of us and must do the often difficult work of letting those things go (like the church we grew up in) while allowing ourselves room to grieve those perceived losses.  It is also on the path of self-awareness that we uncover our gifts and how we are called to use these gifts for the sake of our own fulfillment and in service to the betterment of our world.  As Jesus once said:

 “You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven. (MT 5: 14-16)”

The Non-Acceptance of Grief

The only acceptance in grief is accepting the fact that we will always carry the pain of loss and accepting the fact that this pain will resurface periodically through unexpected circumstance. There will never be a day that we won’t remember the loss, the pain that it caused and continues to cause us. The idea that one day we will simply get over it is a dangerous lie that leaves us feeling guilty or that there might be something wrong with us for still being set off by the memory of that loss.

Case in point: After all the years that I’ve had to heal from the abuse I experienced at the hands of the Catholic Church, and the pain that eventually caused me to leave, you would think I’d be over it. This weekend I was reminded that I am not (over it). Instead, while watching the final episode of the final season of the British series Sex Education, all the pain came rushing back.

I had been given a vision, a mission, and a purpose. I had made a plan and had been encouraged and supported along that plan. I was on the path to give my professional life to the Church and to fulfill my mission to become “pastor” in the way that was available to women in the Catholic Church – pursuing the education to become a parish director. Then that all came crashing down.  You all know the story, and to be honest, I’m sick of hearing myself talk about it.

The short version (as if I could ever tell a short version!) is that I left the Church to forge my own path as “pastor” to a secular audience mostly made up of the Catholic diaspora. That mission failed too.

This is where I found myself while watching a character in a similar state of unwelcome hearing a calling and deciding to forge his own path within that calling. If I wasn’t on an anti-panic attack medication that suppresses crying, I would have been bawling my eyes out. Instead, all I could do was sit in a state of shock as my body tried to process the mixture of emotions brought up while watching a story similar to my own playing out in real time over Netflix. Ugh.

Grief is a harsh mistress. Standing in front of us with riding crop and pummel, always at the ready to whip us back to reality. Life is hard. We’re given visions with a sense of purpose, and that purpose is often torn from our grasp. We make plans and the Universe laughs. We fall in love and find ourselves betrayed. We believe and have faith. We pray. We discern. And still we remain the victims of fate.

Life has its own plan no matter how clearly we might discern.  Even when we fail, our discernment may have been correct. Failure and loss are part of life, and there’s nothing we can do to change or avoid this fact. The best we can do is accept. Accept that life is hard, that shit happens, that there will be disappointment and devastating loss. Accept that the pain of loss and disappointment will always be with us and will periodically rear its head, inviting us into another layer of being with that pain. We weep. We wail. We rage. We curl into ourselves. We become momentarily paralyzed. We love and comfort ourselves. And then we move on until the next reminder comes and then we do it all over again. And in between, we embrace those moments of wonder, joy, and beauty that also make up the human condition. It is also for these that we are here.

The Ego Trap of Future Thinking

As human beings we are gifted with an instinctual response to pain. This response urges us to do whatever we can to escape pain. In many cases, this instinctual escape response has saved our lives. It may have caused us to pull our hand away from a flame, to run from a burning building, or to seek shelter in the face of a storm. This instinctual response has proven beneficial when facing life or death situations and has ensured that humanity would endure, despite the hardships of being human.

An important quality of this escape response is that it serves us when danger is imminent. This instinctual response is meant for the present moment only, and was never meant to become part of our ongoing psychology. Animals, for example, experience those moments of fight or flight and then are done with them, free to move about their daily lives with a certain measure of ease. They do what they need to do to obtain nourishment. They sleep. They play. They poop. They mate. They don’t waste their time on worry.  As such, they live their lives free of the ongoing obsession with preparing to flee (or fight).

Such is not the case with human beings. Instead, we have been conditioned to exhaust our thoughts and our energies with preparing for possible threat so much so that the present moment itself has become a threat from which we must escape. This is where future thinking has come in.

Future thinking is anything and everything that takes us out of the present moment. (Past thinking does the same thing, but in the opposite direction).

We’re not happy enough. We’re not well enough. We don’t have what we want. We want for more. We’re not pretty enough or skinny enough. We don’t yet own red-soled shoes. We’re lonely. Alone. Afraid. We’re not good enough, rich enough. We aren’t famous. The goal we once set out to accomplish has died on the vine. We haven’t yet met our soulmate. Love has eluded us. We’ve accomplished all we set out to do and we still find ourselves dissatisfied.

Future thinking casts us into the hell of wishing, hoping, dreaming, praying, manifesting, for that which we do not currently have, enforcing the illusion that there is something out there, in the future, that will finally make us happy and ease the pain of being human. Future thinking then causes us to seek outside of ourselves, reach outside of ourselves, throw money at things outside of ourselves that promise to have the secrets to what out there, and in the future, will make us feel better – take away and ease our pain.

Literally every industry is guilty of enforcing future thinking. Education that tells us we will have a meaningful job and abundant wealth after investing thousands on their degree. Healthcare that tells us this treatment will save us, and while there might only be a 0.03% chance of a cure, it will be worth the millions of dollars spent and months of agony for the 0.03% chance we might be cured. Corporations who promise their product will guarantee happiness, make you beautiful, stop the signs of aging, help you lose weight, become cured of … etc. Religion for promising our suffering will be rewarded by a lifetime of happiness in the afterlife or that our prayers will make our circumstances change. Self-help programs which promise wealth and happiness. The Secret and similar new thought programs which tell us our future depends on our good thoughts. Astrology that promises us love and money after x,y,z planet becomes aligned in this perfect way. Psychics who promise better times ahead. Mediums who promise that if we heal the wounds of our ancestors all will be well. Shamans who promise to remove the demon from your second chakra which is blocking your way to wealth. New Age and Ascension practitioners who keep promising if we buy their program, we will receive the codes we need to open our pathways to love, happiness, and wealth.

If you do this, then you will get that. The devil (an outward manifestation of the inner adversary/The Ego), used this trick with Jesus in the story of Jesus’ temptation in the wilderness. (Ref Luke 4: 1-14)

“If you turn this bread into stone then you will prove to me you are the son of God.”

“If you worship me, I will give you all these as your kingdom.”

“If you throw yourself down from this parapet you will prove to me God’s words that the angels will pick you up.”

Today’s future thought purveyors are no different. “If you do what we tell you, buy what we are selling, believe as we believe, do as we describe, THEN all your dreams will be fulfilled, and your pain and suffering will come to an end. But the truth is, NONE of these have the power to change the present moment, neither do they have the power to change the human experience.

Pain and suffering are the consequences of being human. So are happiness and joy. It is all part of our human journey and there is absolutely nothing we can do to escape this. There is no magic pill, right thought, or future fantasy that will change the reality of being human.

The key to finding peace and contentment in the human experience has nothing whatsoever to do with the future, and instead has everything to do with being fully present to the NOW. Jesus did not say the kingdom of God was in the future. He said it is in our midst, right here, right now, within and among us (Luke 17:20-21). The NOW is not something to escape. It is something to embrace, allowing ourselves to be fully present to what is right now, instead of wasting our time wishing, hoping, dreaming, fantasizing for a better tomorrow.

Disclaimer: I fully admit to being occupied with future thought myself, throwing my money at future thought purveyors and making future thought promises myself. It’s an ego trap I admit to having fallen into and I am making decisions today that are helping me to unravel from this trap. Join me if you feel so-called.

The End of the Guru Age

For the past 5000-10000 years (since the advent of hierarchy), we have been conditioned to believe that there is some outside force who:

  1. Is the source of Truth (universal Truth and our own truth).
  2. Is the cause and source of salvation.

Every tradition has its own names for these outside perceived authorities: guru, priest, savior, psychic, etc. For all these years, people have sought after these outside perceived authorities for guidance and direction in their lives, hoping for them to tell them what to do and how to live their lives. During this time, people have also sought after those who others have told them will save them (from whatever it is they need saving). For thousands of years, people have given their money, their soul, their devotion, and their worship to these outside perceived saviors when all along they have within them the vehicle and knowledge for their own salvation.

Jesus knew this. The Buddha knew this. Indigenous teachers knew this. And yet humanity has taken and twisted their messages in such a way as to further condition society’s addiction to outside saviors.

Jesus did not come to save us in the way we’ve been taught! He was not some divine sacrifice for humanity’s “sins.” (In the Gospel of Mary Magdalene, Jesus is quoted as saying, “There is no sin.”)  Jesus never said that we had to proclaim him our personal Lord and Savior in order to be saved. These are the hierarchy’s words used to enforce humanity’s obedience to the religion they created in Jesus’ name.

Instead, Jesus taught his companions how to access and take root in the salvation that was already present within them. He showed them how to unhinge from the hierarchical conditioning under which they had been enslaved. He supported them in finding the source of their own inner truth and to understand that this source (which Jesus called Love) is God within them.

It was for this that Jesus was killed. He spoke Truth to power, questioning the status quo, and challenging the culture of codependency that had been fostered by the self-appointed religious and political authorities who benefitted from those who feared them.

Two thousand years ago, Jesus, and others like him, presented a new (original) example of personally responsibility to our own Truth and to the Source of salvation within us. Today, we find ourselves at the threshold of the world they envisioned and where the fruits of their labors are finding their fulfillment. Here we are being given a profound choice: we can continue to remain enslaved by the guru mindset where our salvation and the path of our truth are only accessible through some outside perceived authority, or we can enter into the new world where we are our own guru – knowing that the Source of Truth is within us, and that this is the true path to salvation.

In other words:  stop throwing your money and obedience to some external source of Truth and learn how to find the answers within.

Living Below the Mean

Since 2011 I have been living below the mean and median income of my local community of Oshkosh, WI. Many of those years I have lived far below the poverty level for a family of three.

I’m sharing this information, not for pity, but to put a face on poverty and to shine a light on how most of the people in our community live. For you see, there is a profound misconception in our community (and likely others) of those who live in poverty. Contrary to popular misconceptions, many (likely most) of those who live below the mean are educated, hard-working, responsible, individuals who either by choice or circumstance are making a living much lower than that of their peers.

For me, living below the mean has been part choice and part circumstance. After my divorce, I chose to continue to be as available for my children as I had been during my marriage. I wanted to continue the business I had begun to build while married and maintain the flexibility required when co-parenting two children. I chose to work during the time my children were with their father and adjusted that according to his travel schedule. I packed an easy 40 hours into the work days I had available – making the most of the time I had while dedicating the rest of the time to my children. These choices, and the reality of owning a service business, meant that we didn’t have many extras. I also made many sacrifices so my children could have what they needed. These were personal choices that I gladly made, and my children prove to me daily that I made the right choice. They are absolutely fabulous human beings of whom I could not be more proud!

Then there are the circumstances. Being a sole proprietor in a service industry has its ups and downs. Some years are better than others and location makes a difference. If I were in a bigger city like Minneapolis or Chicago, the work I do is considered common place and is part of the everyday language. When I say “spiritual director” or “Reiki Master” in Oshkosh, all I get is blank stares. Things began to improve as I took my business online, but then you must compete with the millions of others who are seemingly doing what you are doing (they’re not, but the general population doesn’t get that).

In short, I work in a fringe industry and a lot of the fringe doesn’t have money either.  Yes, I could look for other employment, and I have, but when you throw education, experience, and age into the mix, the reality of ageism kicks in and you find yourself relegated to the “secretary pool” where you’re not really wanted because you know how to and have had the experience of thinking for yourself.  It’s a lose-lose situation, one I know I’m not alone in as I chat with my friends of a certain age who have similarly found it difficult to secure gainful employment – even after a lifetime of experience in their chosen industry.

This is the reality. I have my own business (which hasn’t done well the last couple years), and a part-time clerical job. I’m making barely enough to pay my rent (in an increasingly expensive housing market) and a few odd things. Somehow it always works out, but usually by the skin of my teeth. AND I’m one of the lucky ones. Living close to or below the mean means that there are MANY who are living with far less. In this I am humbled and grateful. I also have the support of friends and family who regularly step in with support and I know who I can turn to if I’m really in trouble. Most people don’t have that. So again, I’m grateful.

Finally, I want to make it really clear to those in the back who continue to maintain a certain perception and attitude toward people like myself living below the mean:

  • For me it’s a choice and a circumstance. For MOST it’s not a choice.
  • I am a college educated 58 year old woman.  I have a BA in Business and Marketing. A Masters in Transpersonal Psychology. AND several advanced certificates and specialized trainings. I have run my own business since 2003 and in that time have published eleven books and over thirty online courses and trainings. I work hard and continue to offer my services on a sliding scale because I know MANY could not otherwise afford them. I have also continually been an active and involved member of our community.

Oh yeah, then there’s the chronic illness. That just adds another layer in considering choices and circumstances that impact the reality of living below the mean.

*Image credit: https://www.point2homes.com/US/Neighborhood/WI/Oshkosh-Demographics.html