Vindicated

Please allow me a moment of smugness as we all stand witness to EXACTLY what I’ve been talking about all these many years. There can now be no doubt that we are watching the patriarchal system, based in fear, power, and control, consuming itself. It has set itself on fire and it is imploding in front of our very eyes.

Every single day, we have become increasingly aware of the true evil and corruption that rules this system, watching in horror at what those in power have been doing and have been getting away with for – well…..likely hundreds of years.

Child-trafficking, pedophile, billionaires didn’t just show up out of nowhere. The underlying corruption and evil that has allowed for the “success” of these networks was already in place. And this is just the tip of the iceberg of the deeply entrenched evil that rules our world.

I saw it. I called it. I’ve been ceaselessly pointing it out. For this I’ve been ignored, ridiculed and condemned – mostly by those benefitting from the system. But the reality is, I’m not alone. I’m not the only one who has seen, who has been witness, who has risked – well everything – to be a voice crying out in the wilderness heralding the collapse of everything we have come to know and rely on.

That world is dying….and good riddance!  Aren’t we all sick and tired of being sick and tired? Haven’t we had enough of evil, greedy, gluttonous, narcissistic men becoming billionaires on the backs of our labors? Aren’t we exhausted from watching each other suffer – rather, aren’t our hearts tired from breaking? I know mine is.

It’s time. It’s time for the power system to burn itself to ash so that something new, more loving, more kind, more compassionate, more equitable can take its place.

As much as I want to scream, I F’ING TOLD YOU, I won’t. I just want this to be over so that we can get to the work we were placed here to do –  building the new world.

(and….as I’m watching everything I foresaw coming to pass, I do feel a little bit vindicated – not gonna lie! “sips wine”)


Support for the Death of the Empire

Choosing Timelines

As the year of the Wood Snake draws to a close and the year of the Fire Horse has not yet begun, we find ourselves within a choice point. As we have allowed all that no longer serves us to be consumed by the snake, we now reside within the emptiness of the Void between what has been and what has not yet come into being.

At this juncture we are being given the ultimate choice – will we remain on the path that is driven by perceived powers outside of us, or step off that path and onto the road of claiming our own power and authority?  Personal power, inner authority, and executive functioning are the gifts of the Fire Horse, should we choose to accept them. But first, we must get really clear on how we have given our power away to those we have considered our “authorities.”

The authorities of the past include:

  • Our perceptions about “God.”
  • Those we call “teacher.”
  • Those we have voted into power and entrusted with making decisions for us.
  • Celebrities.
  • Parents.
  • Pastors, priests, etc.
  • Employers/bosses.
  • Human Resource departments.
  • Union leaders.
  • So-called gurus.
  • Peer groups.
  • The media.
  • “Influencers.”
  • Romantic partners.
  • Our children.
  • And just to get the point across: GOD!

In one timeline, we will continue to rely on those outside of us to tell us what is true, what to do, how to act, while allowing them to make decisions for us (believing the lie they are working on our behalf). In this agreement, we are forever subject to the fearful and selfish whims of those we have put into power, and we will only and forever find ourselves powerless.

The timeline, into which the Fire Horse invites us, is that of personal power and authority. In learning how to accurately discern truth on our own, and owning that truth, we come to realize that not one human being knows more about who we are or what we need than ourselves. We are able to see through the illusion of falsehood behind which most people of “power” reside. We see that their motivations are their own and have nothing to do with our wellbeing or what we might need as an individual or a species.

For thousands of years we have lived within this dynamic of giving our power away – and look what it has gotten us…..a species on the brink of its own extinction by its own hand, and a world forever at war – not because people can’t get along, but because those we have placed in power can never get enough.

To this, we say “enough.”

Or do we?

For sixty years, I have lived this lesson, first doing what I was told and believing what I was taught because that was what made one a “good girl.” At a young age, I began to see through the cracks of this illusion and have spent the past 50+ years learning to discern my own truth by trusting what my gut tells me, above all else. Living that truth, however, has never been easy. From kindergarten on I have experienced the punishment that comes from challenging the status quo and questioning that which we are not meant to question. My gut has always proven itself to be true, but that has not made the journey any easier – I’ve lost community, so-called friends, belonging, and the ability to be “successful” within the current system and its rules.

Standing in our own authority costs us everything upon which the current system depends. I have found, however, that I can live no other way. If you found yourself drawn to this blog, I’m guessing you, also, cannot live any other way. The good news is that in the year of the Fire Horse, it will be those who choose to embrace their own inner authority and trust what their own heart tells them is truth, that will thrive. Those who remain in the path of attachment to the status quo, enslaved by external authorities will find themselves suffering in the same dumpster fire in which the world of fear, power, and control is currently heading.

Learn about our mission here.

Interdimensional Exorcisms

Performing interdimensional work is somewhat of a mind-f*ck.  On one hand, the work feels very real wherein the physical and emotional bodies become fatigued by the effort. On the other hand, interdimensional work is neither visible nor tangible, and therefore, impossible to monetize. Who exactly does one invoice for work done on another plane or in ones dreams? And how does one explain to humans conditioned by capitalism that you had to spend the day on the couch watching Netflix because you were working all night in your dreams?

This is exactly what happened the other night. In a very vivid, in-color, hours-long (or what seemed like hours), I was fighting demons. More specifically, I was attempting to gather and protect humans who had not yet succumbed to demonic influences and turned into demons themselves. In part of the dream, I was identifying demons, and their minions, while locating those who had not yet given in to the demons’ touch. This part of the dream felt like a race against time as increasing number of humans were giving into their demon captors. The group of those who had not yet given in was small, but strong. We were hiding in a protected structure while watching the demons and humans-made demon wreaking havoc on the earth. The entire earth was ablaze with their evil destruction. Eventually the demons found us, and we were again on the run. It felt like being in an episode of The Walking Dead – heart pounding, sweat pouring from my brow, anxious in escape. As the demons were in pursuit, I uttered a prayer, and as if plucked from the battle, myself and those who remained untainted suddenly found ourselves in a beautiful Victorian style home, safe and protected from the demons who were continuing to wage war on our world. Once we arrived safely, I woke up from the dream, blurry eyed, out of breath, heart pounding, and exhausted from the journey.

This is what interdimensional work often looks and feels like. Whether in a dream or through a vision, we are THERE, in the center of another world which is, in fact, a reflection of our own. Here we are sent to complete our mission of Love. Sometimes we are battling demons. Other times, rescuing the innocent. Much of the work is about healing. All of it is about transformation – and all transformation is a kind of exorcism.

Exorcism, in some cases, may be like it’s portrayed in movies. More often, however, exorcism is simply about the inner healing that allows one to turn away from the fear that divides us and the Love that unifies. “Demons” are those individuals (or systems) who gain perceived power by manipulating us through our fears. Demons profit from our fear and gain from our division. Love heals the inner wounds that make us vulnerable to these demonic influences, thus depriving demons of their power.  This is how we as a species will regain our place in the world, no longer controlled by those in perceived positions of power, but empowered by Love to recreate the world we were meant to enjoy. The work of this healing is an inside job that is our own responsibility, at the same time, it is an “outside” job, transforming the collective consciousness that has been conditioned by fear.

Hence the need for, and the power of interdimensional work.  It’s just taken me awhile to own this as part of my mission in this world, to accept the strangeness of this part of the mission, and not feeling like I have to apologize or feel guilty for doing nothing on the day following a night of battle.

As for monetizing….I leave that up to the Universe. Somehow, someway, it always works out, and the material means find their way to me, allowing me to continue to pay my bills. Thank you to all those who have been a source of support as I perform the invisible work. I am eternally grateful! 

Minnesota is my Red Line

I’m done.  I’m done giving people the benefit of the doubt and trying to find empathy, compassion, or understanding for their political beliefs when these beliefs justify violence (murder) of innocent people. To put it simply, there is absolutely nothing that makes humanity’s inhumanity to “man” right.

What has been happening in Minneapolis/Minnesota has become my final straw. I am all for reasonable immigration laws and the enforcement of those laws, but what the recently appointed ICE army has been doing in Minneapolis is unconscionable. These actions have been both enabled and celebrated by the current administration (Donald Trump) and by those who still support him, including state-funded media who twist visual evidence to justify murder.  It’s disgusting, immoral, and just plain evil.

To me, it is no longer about (truly, it never really was) Republican, Democrat, Socialist, Libertarian, or otherwise, it is a simple matter of human decency. If you cannot have empathy or compassion for someone who hasn’t had it as easy as you, who has skin of a different color, loves differently than you, is of an ethnicity different than your own, has different religious or spiritual beliefs, or god-forbid hasn’t yet learned English or wears a hijab or turban, then I don’t know how I can have a single ounce of respect for you. Actually – I don’t.

I’m not sorry. In my mind, human beings deserve to feel safe, to have access to food, clothing, shelter, an education and healthcare. If one does not have access to these things within their home country, they have the right to seek it elsewhere. If they do not have access to these things in OUR OWN country, they have the right and duty to DEMAND it. And it is the right and duty of those who have to create a path for those who do not have so they can get those needs met. If we don’t do these things for each other, then we have failed as a species.

As it relates to immigration, I’m not talking about open borders. I’m talking about basic human decency – putting ourselves in another’s shoes and asking, “if I was in this situation, what help and support would I need and how would I want to be treated?”  It is as simple as this.

And to the great people of Minnesota who have been standing up for what is right and working together to protect their neighbors and keep them safe, I thank you.  From the bottom of my heart I thank you. The world is watching and I could not be more proud of the example you have set that now others can follow. You have shown the world that it is truly the people who have the power.  Thank you!

Deepening

It is said that the Magdalene spent her final years in prayer. So too, then, shall I.

It is time. Not for escape, or retreat, but for deepening. Entering into the heart of the world where the cause of all division lies. Pulling away from the noise of external symptoms (ie distractions) and focusing instead on what lies beneath.  Daring to resist the temptation of believing change is affected by what we do and how we show up “out-there.”

It is true – we are broken. But not in the way religions have told us. Not because we have done anything wrong – but because of what has been done to us. By our conditioning. Through our upbringing. In the simple choice of being human.

Suffering is the natural consequence of the human experiment.

But to this we are not condemned. Source is forever calling us back to our original nature as Love and revealing to us the way.

If only we would accept this gift – or rather, not run from it as soon as the going gets tough. As every teacher has shown us, the way to Love is hard – but it is the only way to truly be free in this life.

Love is our mission and our purpose. For humanity, there is literally nothing else.

So into Love I go, not for my own sake, but for the sake of humanity. Diving deep into humanity’s darkest “sins” in search of the wounds beneath the behaviors that are seeking to be healed. Diving deep with the soul of an exorcist, holding humanity in its pain, witnessing to their shattered natures, giving voice to what dare not be spoken, and bathing it all in Love.

It is to this that my Soul is calling me.

If individuals seek me out, so be it. I welcome them. I do not, however, promise ease. The way is hard and to say otherwise would be a lie. Pride works hard to imprison us in our deepest wounds by defending our delusions. Love is not like this. Love seeks only to bring all our pain into our awareness so that it may be seen, transformed, and released.

Love is not a journey for the faint of heart, or for those comfortable in their status quo. Neither is it a journey for the “rich” – unless they are willing to loosen the grip on what they cling to so dearly.

  • Love is simple.
  • Love is kind.
  • Love is generous.
  • Love is quiet and unobtrusive.
  • Love is gentle in its effect, but relentless in its cause.

So into the depths I go because it is not what we do “out there” that matters. Instead, it is all about what we are doing within. As one of humanity’s greatest teachers taught us, “The freedom (Truth, Love,) we seek can only be found within.”

Universal Love Activist

Preamble:Today (1.25.26) I am heartbroken. Yesterday, in the early morning hours following the largest peaceful protest in the history of Minneapolis (50,000+), seven ICE agents gunned down an innocent man, Alex Pretti who had been defending a woman being harassed by ICE. The ICE agents pepper-sprayed him, beat him to the ground, and then shot him several times. The incident was filmed by several civilians and the conclusion is obvious.

Today’s news revealed that the initial shooter has been removed from ICE duty in Minneapolis and moved to another state where he may continue his duties. I’m heartbroken and horrified. More even than this, I’m disgusted with every single member of Congress and the Supreme Court who are doing NOTHING to hold the president accountable for the wave of violence he has unleashed upon this country. I am all for enforcing immigration laws, but this is NOT how it is done in a reasonable society. Sadly, the United States left “reasonable” behind a long time ago.

That being said, while our elected officials are sitting on their hands, I continually am inspired by the actions of Minnesota residents in their ongoing attempts to draw attention to, and put a halt to ICE’s occupation of the Twin Cities. While ICE is out targeting any person who gets their attention (please note that the two most recent executions were white, US citizens), Minnesotans are providing for and protecting their neighbors at risk, accepting donations to help assist those in need, and holding peaceful protests in sub-zero temperatures. Minnesotans are proactive, organized, and driven in their attempts to uphold and defend the constitutional rights of all humans – citizens or not.

In the midst of the serious business of revolution, Minnesotans have also found a way to express their creativity. Whether it be through singing, movement, poetry, writing, or art, the Twin Cities are finding ways to be activists using their own unique gifts. One such example is the “Rebel Loon” images that have been popping up all over social media and beyond:

Inspired by the symbol for the Star Wars Rebel Alliance, graphic designers and artists have created myriad interpretations of the Rebel Loon logo to represent their unique community of activists. Out of their work, I was inspired to create something of my own. I have no idea of what this is for, or where it might be going (other than a momentary action to comfort my feelings of helplessness), but here it is along with some initial brainstorming to accompany my own tiny contribution to the revolution.


Are Our Missions Changing?

By all accounts, it sure seems like it.

One of my primary gifts is that of observation. Within that gift is the distinct ability to identify patterns and through those patterns, to make an educated guess about what is unfolding. One recent pattern that has been standing out in my life, and in the lives of many with whom I am connected, is that of doors closing. For me, this has been a pattern that has been gracefully (except for my own resistance to change and my desire for security) unfolding over the past several years. 2020 was a major turning point. Beginning with absolutely thriving in shutdown which then supported a desire/drive to turn more inward in both my personal and professional lives.  

This inward trend has not only continued, but it has deepen. No longer do I feel the pressure to “put myself out there,” or to beat my head against the marketing wall trying to drum up business for my classes and services. Instead, I wait until some inner guidance tells me to make a post. Until that happens, I spend much of my time in stillness, tending to the needs of the universe while awaiting further instructions.

I know I am not alone in this as I watch so many friends and colleagues resting in the void, awaiting the arrival of their next mission. As one writer recently stated, “the first task of the first-wavers is coming to an end.” To this I can attest as my final in-person Reiki client informed me this week that she would be taking a break.

I too have felt myself needing a bit of a break from one-on-one work. Not because I don’t love it, but because, quite simply, my energies are being called elsewhere.

This is where things get weird. Other than my part-time paid administrative gig, the work I am increasingly finding myself doing in the world is unable to be monetized. To whom would I send a bill, and what would be an appropriate hourly rate for being called to sit in prayer and extend healing to a community currently under siege, or to a friend facing a diagnosis?

The work I’m being called to is happening far beyond the tangible, material world. There is literally no way to charge for that, and yet, the financial support keeps coming – seemingly out of nowhere. It’s definitely NOT because I’m manifesting it by thinking the right thoughts. On most days, I’m terrified so that rules out the “Law of Attraction.” Is it then the universe’s reciprocal response to loving actions? I may never know. I just know I’m grateful and doing my best to stay in Love, open to Love, and obedient to its guidance, while resisting the temptation to fall into “magical thinking.”

I don’t understand the workings of the Universe. But what I think I understand are the patterns that show us where we are no longer called, the void that accompanies closing doors and the anxiety that is triggered in the unknown, and finally, the surety of something new entering in when we have finally (with our cold dead fingers) let go of that which no longer serves, and being willing to embracing it when it arrives.

The Narrow Gate

In the past few weeks, several different and unrelated individuals, who know me and are part of my wider community, have sent me YouTube videos on the Magdalene. They discovered these videos through a channel named The Esoteric Jesus. I took the time to watch the videos and must admit, with only a few nuances of language, the videos I viewed very closely reflect what I have come to know and understand about the teachings of the Magdalene. Though the methods may differ, the teachings revealed are nearly identical to what I teach (having learned these teachings through my work with Mary Magdalene and Yeshua). Whereas I found the AI delivery of these videos distracting, I found the content to be mostly sound. Admittedly, I didn’t learn anything new through these videos, but they have provided a solid ground on which I am finding affirmation and validation for my many years of devoted study and practice. Further, they have provided me with a deepening sense of confidence in the work I have done, and a renewed sense of motivation to continue.

The big question though:  WHAT EXACTLY DO I DO? This is the question I’ve been trying to answer for 25 years. This morning, the answer came:

Like my teachers, Yeshua and Mary Magdalene, and using the methods learned through them, I provide instruction, guidance, and support for those in search of themselves. This is what some might call the spiritual journey. Psychology calls it the path toward individuation or self-actualization. Others call it enlightenment, ascension, or self-realization. By whatever name you call it, it is the same journey – the journey from awakening to the Truth beyond appearances. In personal terms, it is the journey from self-centeredness to universal consciousness.

Yeshua said that to truly accomplish this journey, one must enter through the narrow gate (MT 7: 13-14). Further, he acknowledged that few are able (or willing) to find it. In my own many years of doing this work, I can confirm that this is true. Many are willing to be captivated and enthralled by the early stages of awakening and spiritual growth, for here, everything feels new and exciting. Our curiosity is sparked and we find many ways to feed that curiosity. We feel special, magical, and maybe a little better than “normal” human beings. This is the easy part of the journey. Easy, however, does not last. If it does, you’re no longer growing, you are well entrenched in spiritual by-pass.

The journey through the narrow gate requires ever-deepening layers of self-examination, personal accountability, identification of ego attachments or wounds, healing and transformation. The closer we get to the heart of who we are, the more challenging the journey becomes. Every minute of every day, we are given an opportunity to see what within us remains wounded and then doing the work of healing that wound. It is only the few and the brave who are willing to enter through the narrow gate.  The journey is infinite and eternal, but it is only through the narrow gate that Love (our Truth) can be fully realized.

Not for the Masses

For years I have struggled to understand and make peace with the reality that very few people are attracted to the Magdalene work that I provide, and even fewer complete it. Now I get it:

While likely hundreds of books have been published in her name and a similar number of online resources are available, many of which offer their own versions of “Magdalene training” or offer retreats and pilgrimages in the name of the Magdalene, it is not to the resources and support I provide where people tend to gravitate. Formerly, I took this personally. Now, I acknowledge it as a victory of sorts – a victory, not for myself, but a victory for those who are called to the work I facilitate, especially to those who complete it.

The work of the Magdalene was never meant to be easy. Neither is it something to be entered into lightly for the purposes of puffing up the ego or making oneself feel special. If it was a challenge for Mary, who earned the title of Magdalene through her commitment to and mastery of these teachings, so shall it be for those who courageously embark upon this journey.

It was not to the masses, nor to the other disciples that the risen Christ was revealed. Neither were any of the other disciples ordained to continue the depth work facilitated by Jesus. It was only to Mary, called Magdalene, that these things were given.

The work of the Magdalene is hard. It requires discipline, tenacity, persistence, and a 100% commitment to radical personal accountability. The journey Mary completed under Jesus’ tutelage revealed to her the path through which one is able to overcome the inner demons (fears, unhealed wounds, societal conditioning) that prevent one from knowing their true nature as Love in Union with the All. With single-minded focus, Mary confronted each and every unhealed wound, false perception, non-loving conditioning, and fear which blocked her way from knowing this Love and in doing so, became the embodiment of Love – as Jesus himself had done. There is no other direct follower of Jesus said to have completed this work (with the possible exception of John – though recent scholarship suggests the writings attributed to John may in fact, have come from, Mary, herself).

As Mary’s accomplishment was rare, so has it been throughout history. It is only our pop-culture spirituality that might suggest otherwise. Contrary to mass-marketed spirituality, enlightenment cannot be bought. It can only be uncovered in bits and pieces as we diligently tend to every single obstacle to Love – including (especially) ourselves. This is not the work for the faint of heart. Instead, we must look in the mirror with excruciating scrutiny:

  • What are the lies we’ve told ourselves?
  • What are the attachments we’ve formed?
  • How are we feeding our egos with dreams of popularity, fame, power, or wealth?
  • Where are we making excuses for our inhumanity to our fellow human beings?
  • Where are we harboring hatred?
  • How are we hiding our true selves for the sake of other people’s approval?
  • Where are we depriving ourselves of the things we need to fit into the status quo?
  • How have we bought into capitalistic deceptions and in what ways have we sold our soul to “make it?”
  • What are the sensitivities we’ve ignored, the reactions we’ve excused, or the violence we’ve justified – toward others and to ourselves?

Few, I have found, are willing to be so honest, and fewer still are willing to accept the kind of accountability that true transformation requires. And that’s ok. Like Jesus, the Magdalene wears many faces – a symbol for some, an inspiration for others, and to those called to the depths – a psychopomp leading them on a journey through the underworld where their wounds may be transformed and their truest light revealed.

My most-recommended books on the Magdalene:

Bourgeault, Cynthia, The Meaning of Mary Magdalene – Discovering the Woman at the Heart of Christianity, Shambhala Publications, 2010.

DeQuillan, Jehanne, The Gospel of the Beloved Companion, Athara Editions, 2010.

Leloup, Jean-Yves, The Gospel of Mary Magdalene, Inner Traditions, 2002.


Remembering Who We Are

It seems I have forgotten who I am, and in the forgetting, I have become ill.

Beyond my work as an author, writer, spiritual director, and educator, I have another job. For forty-nine weeks of the year, the job is fine – good even. Three weeks of the year, not so much – not because of the job itself, but because of the price to my nervous system. Being a highly sensitive empathic introvert who struggles with the symptoms of C-PTSD, Epstein Barr, kidney disease, and hypothyroid, I’m vulnerable on a normal day. During these three weeks, ones that require much more from me than usual, I find I struggle. To survive these three weeks, I find I only have the bandwidth to show up where I need to be, when I need to be there, and complete the tasks required. After the work is complete all I have left is to go home and “rot” (ie: disassociate, recover).

During those three weeks, I find it impossible to be my normal self. Instead, I find myself being short-tempered, impatient, grumpy, and extra sensitive. Whereas I have done a pretty good job of cultivating detachment and a sense of peaceful ease during normal weeks, for these three weeks – all bets are off.

Following those three weeks, I spend as much time as possible doing nothing, hermiting in my cave, resting, sleeping, and trying to return to my so-called normal. A big part of this return to “normal” is trying to remember who I am when my nervous system isn’t being overstimulated by too much sound, vibration, movement, light, and other people’s energies.

Now that those three weeks are over, little by little, I’m starting to remember.

When a task takes so much of our physical, emotional, and mental effort, it is easy to forget who we are REALLY. Getting lost in to-do lists, unexpected emergencies, other people’s emotions, and all the details that go into a monumental creation, it is easy to forget that we are not those tasks. We are not the emergencies. Neither are we other people’s emotions. Even with time to regroup and recover, remembering who we really are beyond these responsibilities is difficult at best.

  • Remembering requires separation. Separation and distance from what made us forget.
  • Remembering demands quiet, stillness, and silence – asking us to enter into that place of calm where our true self resides.
  • Remembering invites a return to routine – the routine out of which our body and soul feel nourished, safe, and supported.
  • Remembering asks us to listen – to listen to the “still-small voice,” that knows our truth and what is important for our Soul’s fulfillment.
  • Remembering is accomplished through practice – practicing the distance, the quiet, the routine, and the listening that support us in calling back all the strands of ourselves we have given away and then replanting them deep into the ground where they can begin (again) to thrive.

This year’s remembering has just begun, but already I’ve been reminded of why I’m really here. Not because of the tasks. Not because of the roles, certificates, or titles. Not because of what I do or how I make a living. I’m here to BE who I am and who I am meant to be and that has a specific symbol that has meaning only to me. If I share it, perhaps you’ll get a glimpse of the calling that will spark your own journey of remembering.


For nearly fifty years, (and many lifetimes), Lauri Ann Lumby has been a student and devote’ of Mary, called Magdalene. From original source material, Lauri has discovered remembered the secret teachings of Jesus, as they were revealed to the Magdalene. Lauri has applied these teachings in her own life and from this has developed a curriculum of practical study for those interested in remembering and embodying the truth of their original nature as Love.