I spend a fair portion of my professional life supporting clients and students in naming, claiming, and speaking their truth. However, I find myself spending a lot of my personal life NOT speaking.

Yes, I speak MY truth.

What I don’t always speak is the truth I see in others. Or rather, their manipulations, lies, and deceptions. For as clearly as I know my own truth, I see the truth (or lack thereof) in others.

I see and I know – especially when another is trying to pull the wool over my eyes or over the eyes of others. I can’t be fooled. (I have been fooled in the past, but I’ve since learned to TRUST MY FIRST INSTINCTS.  They are always correct!) 

I listen and watch closely. Liars will always reveal their true face – if not right away, over time. The truth cannot be hidden for long.  Eventually it will creep out from under the carpet where it’s been swept to be seen by those with eyes to see.

Deception has tells – a look in the eyes, evasive or ghosting behaviors, lame excuses, inconsistencies, words not matching behaviors, false promises, leaving out important details, etc. Sometimes it’s just a feeling. Something doesn’t feel right, or something feels off about a person, their business, their practices, their products, their credentials. The stories they tell or the way they present themselves don’t add up. 

Sometimes it’s what’s NOT being said that reveals the lie.

To me, there is nothing worse than a liar!  Especially those who take advantage of others with their deceptions.  Most especially, when the advantage benefits the liar through the typical capitalistic measurements of so-called success:  money, fame, power. Liars getting rich off the backs of the vulnerable humans they have lured into their trap. This (almost regular) phenomenon makes me both angry and sad. Angry at the liar. Sad for their victims.

When I’m really being compassionate, I even feel sad for the liar. Why? Because the only people who need to lie are those with something to hide – often something they are hiding from themselves. A deep well of insecurity, for example, is a typical characteristic of liars.

The recovering perfectionist and truth-telling prophet in me wants to call out these liars from the rooftops at the top of my lungs.  “Liar, liar, pants on fire.” I want to point out every infraction, discrepancy, deception, and point out every tell. I want to see the liars brought to justice and watch the kingdom they have built for themselves burn itself to the ground.

I won’t though. I’ve learned it doesn’t do any good. Those enamored of the liar won’t believe me anyway. People refuse to see the truth right in front of them, sometimes even after it has blown up in their face. People are on their own path and will either eventually figure out the deception or die trying.

I’m also not an asshole. I might think like an asshole on occasion, but I refuse to act like one. (I’m sure there are certain people who would disagree with this statement – LOL!)  What if I’m wrong?  (I’m not!) How would I feel if someone accused me of lying (they would be wrong)?  I adhere to the Golden Rule.

I also believe strongly in the restorative justice of Karma.  Karma is a MF Bitch!  I’ve seen her in action. Whether in this life of the next, liars will get their due. And the evil part of me relishes in the fantasy of that retribution.

So, I hold my tongue. I watch. I observe. I listen. I pay attention. I discern. I let Truth speak for itself and allow the space for liars to dig their own graves.

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